Some would have us tiptoe on eggshells.
They would make great OSHA rule-writers.
Don't you love their approach to a ladder?
Do not -- repeat, do NOT -- step on these steps!
Okaaaaay. Maybe I can make a plant stand
out of it. Of course, I will have to be careful
to not touch the dirt or swallow plant food.
(See it now: Do NOT stand on this STAND!)
Some of their advice makes sense,
though if you need it, you are in trouble.
Do not glue your eyelids shut
should NOT be something you don't know.
Here are a few other no-no's none of us need
unless we're ten steps short of a ladder:
Do not use this hairdryer/radio/drill underwater.
Do not use this clothesline to bungee jump.
Do not bathe in this battery acid.
Do not . . .enough of this. I have to fly
somewhere where they sell ladders
that they allow you to climb and a bunch of
caps that are NOT childproof to replace
these other cotton-pickin' deals, then hire
someone to undo the damned caps so I can
replace them. If anyone knows how to make
a ladder and barrel of caps in an underseat bag,
let me know ASAP. Diss Gusted
I'm with you. Today's kids can't stand behind his Dad like I did, learning to drive that way, and watch a car come up over the hill and hit him in the shoulder, rolling us over. They are cocooned at birth, never let out of the womb, until they rebel and pierce their tongues with unsanitary studs and fill their bodies with drugs, prescription or otherwise, to escape their OSHA childhood--Michael Jackson.
Words are "slippery when wet", of course, but your insight is a clearly-directed spotlight in a world of dancing marsh-mist and moonbeams. Sense out of nonsense here! :)) xx
Ah yes Pea, the "Outrageous Simpleton's Hypocrisy Act". Their credo is, it must be wrong or we wouldn't do it that way! You've taken aim, right between their beady bureaucratic eyes and fired a bulls eye shot into another ludicrous premise. The premise that only government has the intelligence to think and reason for the individual. "Dis gusted" is an ever increasing segment of the U.S. population. Write more of your pragmatic wisdom to share with us. I enjoy it. I bid you love and peace my dear friend. Jon Michael
I auppoose OSHA does overdo it a bit. Although in my place of work, it's law. Sometimes a pain in the, as grandma used ssy..the place where you sit doown! Loved it!
The Wholly Book of Doo-Doo-Rot-on-Me is adult satirical humor featuring adult language and adult content, and the work is a parody of the Old Testament Book of Deuteronomy.
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Regis
There. Got that rant out. Informative write.
Ron
Carmen
hugs,
Sheila
Love and Blessings,
Christine
(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.
Always,
Deborah
Cheers,
Dan
fee
Peace
Tony
Phyllis, you are always an authentic and creative delight to read!
Blessings,
Christine
I auppoose OSHA does overdo it a bit. Although in my place of work, it's law. Sometimes a pain in the, as grandma used ssy..the place where you sit doown! Loved it!
a good example of black humor, Phyllis ...