Checklist for Santa
'Twas the night before Christmas and all thru the house
There wasn’t much stirring —except maybe that mouse
And so I chased him right out of the house.
Now we don’t have a chimney, at least not one you can see
But we do have a fireplace, and it’s warm and comfy.
I don’t hang stockings there ‘cause I don’t have those things
Well, none that I talk about, but those fishnets look interesting.
So our mantle is bare, except for 2 candelabras settin’ there
How they got there I don’t know and I don’t really care
Plus a nice looking urn, awaiting ashes I guess
Just not meant for me, please, and no that’s not a “yes.”
So there’s no chute for you to come tumbling down
And no soot to blacken your beard or your crown.
Our roof is too jagged to accommodate a sled
And reindeer just wouldn’t find it a nice place to tread.
You’ll have to park out in front, that’s the name of that tune
And if you'll be lucky to be airborne by sometime next June.
You’ll need something to drink, something to wet your ol’ whistle
Some brandy should do it, that’ll make you pucker and bristle
If you’re not too thirsty about two shots should do it
And if you don’t like it, no problem, I’ll get around to it
Well, on to the presents gotta leave lots of space
Don’t want those cases of wine all over the place
Just stack ‘em up there right next to the tree
That’s one for my friends, and five just for me.
No need to get greedy that’s just not my style
But a shiny new car would give me smile
Not a Caddy or a Lexus, not any of those
Just a plain little Chevy or Ford I suppose
Something sexy for my wife, an outfit with merit
Make it sexy for me, 'cause she gets to wear it
Something for our son, that’s very very quiet
Or bring lots of food, he can’t even spell diet.
That just about covers it, my list is quite short
And about that brandy—I already took a snort
So warm up the reindeer, and load up the sleigh
And you better get crackin’ for a very long day.
Well, Merry Christmas, you jolly old elf
Please put the bottle back up on the shelf.
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Chip Bergeron
Regis
Lovely checklist...
Happy holidays to you and yours
thank you for a cheerful write :)
Love and Light
Lily
Cheers,
Dan