ALTHEA FROM KOREA

The lady in the corner store,
The damsel from Korea.
With charcoal hair and sparkling eyes
She answered to 'Althea'.

I went in there but once a week
To buy my cigarettes.
We'd engage in mindless repartee
Then I'd leave, though with regrets.

As time elapsed I realized
I'd become smitten with this maid.
The time had come, I told myself,
To end this mad charade.

I knew she had to feel the same,
Feel ardor in her breast.
My fatal charms had worked before,
She's no different from the rest.

So, just last week I sauntered in,
I strutted and I prinked.
She stared agape then bent her head
and shyly, coyly blinked.

Twas then I knew I'd make her day
with what I was about to say.

"I'll hang the 'closed' sign on the door
so we can spend an hour or more
together in the pet-food aisle.
I promise you I'll make you smile.
Her eyes grew wide
her face turned grim.
I heard her say:
'Don't think so, Tim!'

She cleared the counter with one hop
while airborne, she began to chop.
She used her hands, her feet, her knee
She beat the daylights out of me!

As I lay here in plaster-cast,
I keep reflecting on my past.
I've traveled far and traveled wide
With women flocking to my side.
I thought I was the King of hearts,
But none of them knew martial arts!

R.T. Caldwell