The GPS From Hell (poem) by John Michael Domino on AuthorsDen

The GPS From Hell
by John Michael Domino → (All Poetry by John Michael Domino)
Friday, February 2, 2018 Rated "G" by the Author.

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Traveling on a road not so far away we used our first GPS and here is what happened one day...

One day going through the Big Apple our GPS got us into a mess! Going around in circles in New York City can bring on a lot of stress! We heard the shout “recalculating, recalculating!” in the middle of a tunnel! Then, at the end of the tube, all the traffic merged, like a huge funnel. Our GPS told us to take a “sharp right” when we were stuck in the middle of a traffic jam. Then, this guy cut everyone off, turned a sharp right and which caused our brakes to slam! I thought, he probably has got the same problem with his GPS, “What a mess!” But turning right too quickly could have cost us our lives, so I gave it a rest! We got off and the next exit about twenty miles on the edge of town. Our GPS belted out “recalculating, recalculating” again, causing my wife to fret and frown. She belted “Why don’t you shut that dam thing off and use a map!” I replied “Sorry, don’t have one, so we have to rely on this piece of crap.” I tried to get on the next exit but a detour took us over a bridge to Brooklyn Heights. Then our messed-up GPS tried to direct us to make a U-turn over a construction site! After all of this confusion, we turned the blasted thing off and began to pray! I followed the signs that took us back upstate, and finally, we found our way! Don’t get me wrong, when a GPS works it can be a lifesaver as well. But that day in New York City our GPS gave us directions straight from hell! Amen! ©JMD 1/2/18

Reviewed by Jane Noponen Perinacci

Reviewed on February 7, 2018

That had to be a real nightmare!! I keep a Road Atlas in my car but try to bypass the cities.

Love ya!

Jane

Reviewed by Susanne Leist

Reviewed on February 4, 2018

The City is the worst place to get lost. Taxi drivers driving crazy, pedestrians stepping into traffic, and the lousy signs. I feel your pain.

Reviewed by John Herlihy

Reviewed on February 2, 2018

Never had a GPS installed, shucks, I don't even have a "smart phone", just an old Nokia clunker over six years old to make a receive calls like in the old days, but it hardly ever rings. Still, I enjoyed your poem today about the strange workings of the GPS.

Reviewed by Ronald Hull

A wonderful true life story written as a poem. There seems to be something mesmerizing about GPS that makes us think that it's infallible. But I was impressed recently while riding with Metrolift. It brought us to a bunch of connected condos on a main boulevard and told us that we had arrived. Then, the driver took the next right, another half block, and turned into the back of the complex where all of the garages were behind the condos. Lo and behold as we drove through the maze of garages, it finally directed us to the right one, signified by the address number by the garage door.

I have always relied on intuition and memory (drive across country without a map) to get where I'm going� (including New York City). Failing me recently when my memory failed. And, maps that I can no longer hold up and read, often traveling with caregivers who can't read maps.

My experience with computer maps generated with directions, three or four times, taking me close but not actually where I needed to go, caused great frustration and delay.

Ron

Reviewed by Michael Schafer

Technology, don't ya just love it? We've had our own GPS experiences that led us the wrong way.