Siblings rivalry shouldn't get out of hand but that dirty (like any Canadian cousin) lizzar of a brother crossed the line insulting my Coors, I didn't want to tell but after PeeWee spilled the beans I couldn't but start talking.

Jersey Devil Ed, yes my lil’brother
will no take for anything a full bath
it’s him giving Jersey a bad name
by disgusting smell and eating flies,
which our Momma has forbidden
“that’s no manners in our house,”
on his wooden head, now enraged
she will tell him and then…whack!
with the heavy iron ladle a swing
hoping that he would understand,
as PeeWee, showing no manners too
seeing Jersey crying would laugh
making Mother to believe that her son
was making fun of his sweet Momma
and…you all guessed it, a mighty swing
and another iron backed mighty whack!
Yours truly when the maternal googles
focused on me I was all funeral,
just shaking my head to show her
that my brothers make me so very sad
having no respect for Mother dear
armed with a mean weapon of iron cast,
coming to thing if she swung, duck!
no way I would get something of that.
Jersey call me all many thing lately
and had the nerve to add “tightwad”
for no giving Mother more money
for those expensive cosmetics to buy
“which can’t improve that old battle axe
so she can go and get us a new papa”
that was said by PeeWee and he’s lucky
because like him, I am not a lose-mouth rat.
But I am digressing, of Jersey I want to tell,
the family black sheep, a smoking scandal,
badmouthing his poor brothers for nothing,
born of the blanket on the wrong side,
no legit like PeeWee and yours truly
we carry the family honor to a man,
because we need to defend all those girls
to believe in being a little longer virginal,
all bets will be off for all of them the day
lil’brother Jersey Ed, decide to take a bath.