Fractured Nursery Rhymes
Jack and Jill went up the hill,
to fetch a pail of frack.
Jack fell down and broke his crown,
his employer had no AFLAC.
Mary had a little lamb,
its fleece was white as cocaine.
Everywhere that Mary went,
bald men followed her for Rogaine.
Little Ms. Muffet sat on a tuffet,
to eat her Pop Tarts and Silk.
A drone came to spy her,
floated right in her face beside her.
She dispatched that little bastard,
with her very own Stinger.
Jack Spratt could eat no fat,
his wife could eat no lean.
Everywhere the Mrs. Spratt waddled,
behind her hunking behinder,
Jack could not be seen.
Mrs. Jack Spratt had a fat cat,
in bed, poor Jack was squashed between.
Anorexic Jack, a compulsively queen,
scrubbed their sweaty flab with Mr. Clean.
Little Jack Horner sat in the corner,
for sticking his thumb in her pie.
Timeout for Jack, given no slack,
while her love come with glazed eye.
Four and twenty blackbirds, baked in a pie.
The insiders were in the countinghouse,
creating another Ponzi lie.
While eating their exotic dish,
they choked on blackbird bones,
My, oh my.
This little piggy went to market,
to buy a doggie a Milk Bone.
This little piggy was homeless,
foreclosed from his home.
This little piggy had sushi,
while tuna could no longer roam.
This little piggy was starving,
while sushi piggy had fun.
This little piggy went, “Bitch, bitch, bitch,”
couldn't even give a dog a bone.
Copyright 2013 © Ronald W. Hull
8/29/13
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Regis
a bit for a gourmet bone of
pork, Ron
Lady Vivian
budd
Giggles and laughs!!!
Love ya!
Teresa
Roger
Not gonna say that all of them were lame,
But I did enjoy them mostly, they gave me a laugh,
Enjoyed all but one, making my enjoyment way more than half...;-) e
Hilarious!!!! More please!!
Lady Mary Ann
Who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead
And when she was good, she was very, very good
But when she was bad she was horrid.
This was funny. Love the old nursery rhymes.
L
Love ya!
Jane
Great minds think alike!