My Redneck Alter Ego Salley Sue Got A Ring For Christmas!!
Art By Joe Bluhm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My Babee Dun Gif Me A Rang
By Salley Sue
my babee done gif me a rang
and it shore bes a purdy thang
we wuz a sattin on tha porch swang
las nite in tha cole munlite
and Billy he tels me ta stick
my han in hiz overhall pooket reel qick
well I knowd all bout that pooket
and bout Billy's manlee rocket
so I jes pooshed my fingers rite down
an ta my amazd surpriz
I seen it wif my own ezes
a goldan rang wuz whut I fownd
I squeled "Billy you swet ole thang
you dun went and byed me a rang
kiss me Babee, anywhere on my bodee
maybe my tootie or my boobie"
My Billy thanks I'm a reel hottee
an afta he done tuuk hiz priz
Billy boy loked me rite in my ezes
and he sed, "Now Salley Sue
I"ll be hornest wif you
this heer aint no engamant rang
for a man ta bye a cow
whan he"s a gettin free milk
why that a bes a dum azz thang
an I aint as dum as I luuk no how"
well I smaked hiz face
and put back on all my lace
and then I thunk bout it a while
why mes up a guud thang
wif a stuped wedin rang
it'd kinda tak tha fun
outa the naste thang we dun
that nite on tha ole porch swang
so then I pologized
fer blackin both hiz ezes
and give him a beeg slopee kiss
cause it's lots moore fun
when it aint a sposed ta be dun
maried folks don't know whut thay miss
well that dimund stone fell out
in a day or too
an my finger turnt as black
as a crow's waju
so I throu tha dam rang away
hay what kin I sey
Billy mite be cheep but he's cute
I do not know Sallie Sue or Billie(Bob?) -- but that scene is a rerun from millions of porch swangs across time -- all that lace eh? -- very classy, or? -- loved this Belle -- your a marvelous hoot my friend -- peace and love to you (but no cheap rangs) -- Jon Michael
LaBelle,
I just love ya when you do this...puttin' all dat lace back on must be real troublesome, why didn't you jus strangle him with it?
Bless you, you've made the morning bright.
A poem that should had been dedicated to that long suffering and badmouthed hillbillies family Ed's that ain't married a first cousin yet, although that Salley Sue is sassy enough to be our kin!
Are you advocating licencious behavouir dear Belle ha, you're right them married folks don't know, at least most of them, I think, but they can dream, like you, ha,
by the way, where did you pick up such language? Hugs!Jasmin Horst
Deputy Dave Jenkins sets out to find the murderer of the local high school principal, aided by a voice from the grave that is sometimes helpful and sometimes misleading.
"Murder isn't usually this funny."
Amazon reviewer
Deputy Dave Jenkins sets out to find the murderer of the local high school principal, aided by a voice from the grave that is sometimes helpful and sometimes misleading.
"Murder isn't usually this funny."
Amazon reviewer
Share
Print
Save
Follow
God bless you. Kathy
Newfie Hugs, Rose
I just love ya when you do this...puttin' all dat lace back on must be real troublesome, why didn't you jus strangle him with it?
Bless you, you've made the morning bright.
John
(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. ;D
Blessings and love,
Susan
fee
JOYCE * HIS INSPIRATIONS
annie
GOD BLESS
Tony
You R amazin.
:)
John
Don't go there ... don't GO there ... a ring? Pocket rocket?!? Laughing too hard to comment -
(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.
EDvard, Ole Brother
by the way, where did you pick up such language? Hugs!Jasmin Horst
Hey, that's better than nothin! Keep Rockin, Salley Sue!