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The Big Adjustment 1/29/2024 8:10:50 AM
Adjusting to Boston after stress heart attack that forced me to retire, the adjustment has been - and continues to be - a challenge that I hope will bring much growth, albeit in my autumn years where wisdom is supposed to "kick in!" The Elephant’s Waiting Room
In the summer of 2008, May 16 to be exact, at 62, leaving California, family and a lifetime behind and moved into Beacon House, a senior building in Beacon Hill, in Boston. It was a fresh start; a clean slate.
It’s been almost 17 years and, grateful as I have, and, continue to be, I have not adjusted. To some degree, of course, I have come to terms with my new home and environment, but the people? I don’t think I ever will: I think I have come to understand the adage about East and West “never meeting” or something like that.
I am mature and responsible enough to admit that it has been my issue because my past life was so different but after working myself to (nearly) death, I had a stress heart attack (I used to run marathons for “chill out,” that’s how hyper I was! I couldn’t get enough of the career I practiced (PR/media relations specialist) and had my own cable in Santa Monica.
My world consisted of highly educated, well-to-do, high achieving people and we all shared a world of hard work and social commitment to our community but knew how to play hard as well. The chilled Chardonnay flowed in the evenings as we fund raised millions throughout the years fo all kinds of good causes: Police department, Heart Association, fire department, Salvation Army and a supported myriad charities, especially those benefitting children and single mothers. We really gave back and the rewards still warm my heart. But I just never knew when to stop… until my little heart almost did it for me!
And, as they say in Hollywood, “You’re as good as your last movie,” folks, being human, went their way and I was pretty much on my own. I learned the meaning of friendship… and, having a son on the East Coast in a private college, I had to strap my boots, get my act together and make a fresh start – formally retiring from work and keep the stress at a low level. I liquidated my assets and put all my pennies into my son’s education.
So I went from one of the ritziest neighborhoods (Pacific Palisades where President Reagon lived to a senior building in Boston, albeit in Beacon Hill, my first choice and for which I’m eternally grateful.
Positive a person as I am, I realize that as the “interloper” and Boston “crasher,” it is my responsibility to be as open-minded as I can, to the new city, it’s values – and way of thinking. It’s only fair; I am the kid from out of town; the town that belongs to them.
The change has been so drastic. I honestly did not know that Boston proper was a blue collar town (nothing, nothing ever wrong with that, of course) but it took me a while to begin to understand why I was having such a difficult time acclimating. Everything was (is) soooo different. And, yet, I have always (and continue to) appreciate the wonderful differences and love the city that has been so good to me. It is I who continues to adapt… and continue to accept the challenge and try to be gentle with myself in the process.
The trajectory of my life has been one of which books are written and the life and story of an immigrant whose parents sacrificed in all manners to cross the Texan border to achieve the American dream. It has taken a great deal of work, since a child, but I have, thus far, achieved the American dream through education, a career of my dreams, marriage – and the ultimate: a son of whom I am very, very proud. The biggest blessing of my life.
I find it very ironic to have lived in one of the most prestigious neighborhoods in this country to now live in a building (albeit a beautiful Landmark in Boston) with homeless, drug addicts and, for the most part, uneducated people. All, of course, deserve to live here, just as I do. It is I who continues to be open minded and accepting, while I remain faithful to my lifetime commitment to self improvement, self care and love for my neighbors and folks in my world; I do my best.
I do not, in any way, feel sorry for myself; that would be a mistake. I count my blessings from the moment I open my eyes and go through my day in meditation, prayer, exercise and a love of learning.
These are the autumn of my years and I want to, move than ever, make them count. Sharing this is a privilege!
