Life’s a bitch and then you die

Or so I have been told,

If I may be so bold

I don’t agree with that.

We spend the first nine months of life

In a warm and comfy womb,

And then whammy kaaboom,

We’re forced out of our home

And someone smacks our butt.

Our food line is suddenly cut,

And we’re freezing in an ice cold room.

It seems like it’s all downhill

For a long long time.

Life has no rhyme

And even less reason.

They don’t understand us

No matter how hard we try

Until we start to cry.

Suddenly we’re important

And a herd of them come running

And they come in a noisy throng

To see what could possibly be wrong

They stand around the crib and stare at us

The indignities we suffer

As they swarm us like a heard of ants

To see if we have dirty pants

Or we are hungry again

To find out the problem

They poke and prod in private places

I’d love to be able to see their faces

But all I see is shadows

So I listen as they say, “Her pants are wet,

And the smell in here isn’t from the pet

Someone get me a wet wash cloth please

But things change when we learn to walk

And they get better when we learn to run

That is when the real fun has begun

For they spend all their time chasing us

And from that moment on

Their worry will never cease

And they won’t have a moments peace

Until we way past twenty-one

No life is not a bitch by any means

It’s more like a life long game

And life will never be the same

Once a baby’s on the way.