The most Uplifting time of life You turned fifty and confused As you take another look You realize to be uplifted You might just have to re-cooperate Changes need to be made You will have to think about A “Cross your Heart” bra Or maybe a “Cross your Knees” To lift the bust Some “Step-in” panties To lift that stomach And Oh boy some
“Viagra” To lift your husband To please your sex drive Oh! Boy But the visit to the doctor Could be a pain in the ass If he walks in with that glass If you laugh to much You pee in your pants Cough in church Your ass start to sing along And with the slightest breeze You start to sneeze And you poop in D-Minor Oh it is so “Uplifting” to be fifty Just remember when you sneeze Cross your knees and squeeze For the Most Uplifting Melodic sounds of fifty
I remember Elsie saying, "I give up, I ain't no skinny-minnie." That was 15 years ago and she still looks the same--not fat, just pleasingly plump. Then, we all go south sometime.
Air bubbles in the tub are one of the few pleasures afforded us in our decline, lol! You are seriously demented, Tinka, lol, but I can relate(to my horror). Ah what would we do without you, sis? Wish I could have caught this yesterday as I needed the chuckles...
LOL this is terrific.... love your sense of humor...... of course staying sweet 16 at heart will balance things out... well except for what leaks out under pressure LOL
OMG! Only you could have written this! I'll guarantee that everytime I think of this all day long...I'm gonna crack up laughing.
Or maybe I should just cry, knowing I can relate soooooooooo well.
Ahhh, what a great and royal spoof of an ode to the endless and questionable joys of aging. The right to laugh at one's well-earned gastric leaks and foibles beyond the age of fifty is not to be compromised. Great great poem:-)
Aberjhani
If this wasn't so darned true, it would be hysterical, Tinka. There is a way to keep your boobs up high, just give them a tuck then roll 'em up and plop them in your bra...I remember when "tuck and roll" was a kind of upholstery job for the seats in your car...LOL Clever write, Tinka and a whole lot of fun.
Take care,
Only a person with the experience and know how can comment and write like this Jerro...what a bitch huh???
Love Stinka
Reviewed by Jerry Bolton (Reader)
Reviewed on March 24, 2006
Oh boy, is Tinka in a mood today! Whadda bucha crazy things you shot outta your intelligent self today. All kidding aside, this is funny, but it is too damn close to the truth to be TOO funny. Gotta love it.
Sixty-seven days after departing Flores Island in Europe’s westernmost waters, the schooner Heimdall and her stalwart crew has finally arrived at the mysterious Isla Socorro in the Revillagigedo Archipelagoes. The discoveries they make are astounding
Love, Birgit and Roger
Ron
Love, Lin
love and peace, Carole
Paul;-)
Or maybe I should just cry, knowing I can relate soooooooooo well.
Thanks Tink for the grins!
Lisa
Eileen
Aberjhani
(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in America, Karen Lynn in Texas. :D
Take care,
Sherry
Outstanding, and very creative. Thanks for sharing, Tinka.
And what a tune!! Can't wait to hit 60; I hear the melodies get even better.
Regis
Great humor in this...and truth!
Susan
felix
my type of poetry lololol
yeah
lol
pax A
Another humourous and satorical gem, Tinka !
Love
Peter
Love Stinka