After the ecstasy, the laundry

spin cycle

older times, gifted me with grace

i seemingly crafted into my race
there was nothing i needed, or couldn't be
fearless, talents, wild and needlessly free
i could hear their whispers, on how i'd fall down
instinct ignored those wishes of unmasked clowns

dammit those were the times my pride turned ghost

and

dammit those were the times life sailed that perfect coast

good memories fill heavy tonight 

i just want to stay in this light
and then pretend nothing ever changed
keep pretending each second’s still the same
a youth of perfection, tasting so sweet
intuition instinctively my favorite treat
strong drive with need never once did fail
not for rain, snow, sleet or hail
when the winds roared beyond control
i knew my imagination had set sail

that's when they dove in

believing with no doubt they would win

as i waited until they finished their thrill

slowly did i respond to kill

no not a violent grown girl

just malicious, devious, revengeful, better, stronger, a better actor, torture pleasing, took each prisoner and above all far sharper in the area of intuition

dammit those were the times i loved the most

why would anyone chase ecstasy from a crazy mind

knowing so and calling them just the same

why, cause that's their game

muffling their scores

laundry quick as chores

no trace

no face

just traumatic secrets

and lasting bets

older times did gift me a bit late

top of my status, every state

learning to embrace hate

prepared to be bait

dammit those were trying times

dammit i have crossed too many lines

ecstasy was presented by threat alone

same old attempts turned me to stone

do not ever mistake

my kindness for your fate

i love the laundry, erasing each hate

i fear no one left

come grab me i'll pay

to perform more laundry today