DARKNESS
Bats are tired of blood-rush from
hanging hidden upside-down,
wolves sore from all the howling;
when is he going to get over himself?
Why can’t he just admit God won when
He fired the gun, and move on?
Without him there’d be less
puffing of cigarettes, danger
skulking round corners and
skulduggery lit beneath lampposts;
Vegas at night would cease to be
the pit of hell as seen from Mars.
Lovers need only dappled shade
of drifting overhead palms
to be completely satisfied;
there’d be less lives broken
if hearts were clear daylight
and war’s sneaking pestilence
couldn’t call first strike of black surprise.
I’m fed up with his coal-seam thoughts,
rubbishing yet another fine day without rain,
bringing him down.
Still, the old loser hangs on,
blotting and blighting whatever he can
with his trigger-finger itching,
exacting blind revenge
in parks, palaces and temples,
crawling under stones.
stimulating work, Kate ...
(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.
Blessings, xx
Christine
and the bite is right on target;
luv 'coal-seam thoughts' one of just
many fine phrases here;
you're sharp and wicked and wise all in one
john
Unique writing of the pales of darkness.
Lady Mary Ann
Axilea
Your naturalistic opening artfully conveys the weariness inherent in the dualism (pun intended) of your selective worldview; next comes the deft comic touch tainting the prince of darkness into a metaphoric corner (incidentally, that is some nice metonymy implied in your title) with those broad brush strokes… [he got the fever, oh yeah… he got it good!]; then comes the fret of subterfuge… and all that neon naughtiness that is Vegas… umm umm umm… let’s see there is the weariness, the fever and the fret… yeah, you guessed it there is a real Keatsian undertow to this… not just because of the synaesthesia either. Nice touch that a sunny day brings his infernal highness down, too! Then a fine fit to end, taking us full circle beyond the romance and the military machinations to the unseemly world of bugs and insects. Bravo, Kate. This one would bring a smile to a jade.
Roger
Lovely dark afternoon reading.
Ron
Amor
Deborah
blotting and blighting whatever he can
with his trigger-finger itching,
exacting blind revenge
in parks, palaces and temples,
crawling under stones.
This final stanza challenges an open mind to truly take score on him or herself, the degree to which admittance of guilt is in order. I'm signing off now to do just that. I hope I pass. (So well done! Kudos.)
budd
Regis