St George was a knight in armour
With an eye for a royal daughter
A dragon would have eaten her
But brave George stopped the slaughter
He quelled the fearful reptile
That scared the population
And led it through the city to
Uproarious ovation.

That’s when the tale turns doubtful
(At least to modern ears)
He’d sorted out the dragon
That had plagued the place for years.
He’d led it through admiring crowds
And that was very fine
But George rode into legend
And he left the girl behind!

All hail to George of England,
A gallant patron saint
But a devil of a ladies’ man
It’s all too clear he w’ain’t.
If good Saint George returned today
I’d give him this advice;
‘If you’re here for dragon slaying, George,
‘You’d better up the price.
‘If they want your trusty sword
‘Tell ‘em you want a good reward -

‘Say, “OK - I’ll give it a whirl -
But only if I get the girl!”’

A present for my dad - who is called George!