My house roof’s metal, mostly tin,

Plays eerie song in tune with wind.

Passing over, its shape causes lift,

Ripples surface with vertical shift.

Katawhing, whee, katawong, too!

Until accustomed, it can get to you,

Katawhing, katawhee, katawinu!

Raise eyebrows, blythely continue.

Daylight hours birds come in flocks,

Sample offerings, eat seed stocks,

Birdfeeder droops from wire strand,

Near roof, tantalizingly spanned.

Sunflower seeds sprayed around,

Feathered friends, scatter on ground.

Squirrels gather with brash impunity,

Harshly compete with bird community.

Fuzzytailed rascals learn to climb

Wall, eave, and roof, time after time.

Hear a merry tune, their little dance thing

Tippy, tippy, too, tippy, tippy ting.

Across tin they scamper and play,

Jump to feeder roof, find can’t stay,

It’s too slick and they fall kathump,

Try wall, eave, roof, again, kabump.

Ladder to roof gives easy access,

Refill when picked clean, more or less.

Leave it standing at night’s approach,

Not aware that thieves may encroach.

Badaboom, thump, badaboom alone,

Badaboom, thump, drumming baritone.

“Why are the squirrels in such a fight?

Ten-thirty. Don’t they asleep at night?”

Wife I face, eyes wide, our mouths ajar,

 “Squirrels? Oh no! Too heavy by far!”

Scramble for boots and flashlight,

Rush out to darkness of night.

Isolated torches, blazing orange orbs

Well above the roof, night color absorbs

Blackest black, in darkness it dances,

Large bear gauges elevation and chances.

Bails off roof to springy fern mat,

Mother of all kawhumps, falls flat.

For a landing it’d care not repeat,

Imobile for seconds ‘fore gaining feet.

Flees, gladly done with its scuffle,

Coat riffling a shiny shuffle,

Flash lights up marauding bear,

Not too much the worse for wear.

Ladder to roof, pitch it found fine,

Could reach nothing on which to dine,

Found self stranded, light in eyes,

Wild man laughing, the only prize.

My roof of metal flexes, never tears,

It plays eerie song in tune with bears.

They pass over with bump and thump,

Drum roll: ta da, they fly— KAWHUMP!