I Wouldn’t Trade a Day
It’s two in the morning and I’m wide awake
It’s not a new event, but a familiar companion
We have danced this dance more than once
It has been part of my life for years
It doesn’t seem to matter what I take
Sleep continues to elude me
I have delved into a myriad of reasons
And know it’s not a result of fears
Nightmares haven’t plagued me since I was a child
Ear aches are no longer part of my life
My medications calm me and release me of strife
When I was younger it was said
That once asleep I slept like the dead
Nothing could wake me.
Then I became a mother
Then the slightest whimper voiced by my baby
Roused me from sleep
With all grogginess gone
I’d go to the nursery without making a peep
But now the children are grown
And the marriage is over
But it isn’t the loneliness I have known
Nor is it having an empty nest
But the pain that I suffer with each movement
That robs me of rest
Awake I can push it out of my mind
A trait I learned long ago
When I had so many responsibilities I couldn’t ignore
By sheer will power I could keep the pain confined
To a small section of my mind for moment or hours or days at a time
Until I forgot to feel it at all
I wish that control I could now restore
But age has taken its toll on me
And the pain no longer obeys my command
To recede from the forefront of my mind
I seem to have lost the key
That allowed me such control
But all is not lost because I still manage to be me
Even through pain my mind is still sharp
And my sense of humor unchanged and my love of life intact
So once more I will endure the night’s silence and the pain
Until science can find a cure for what ails me
But, my friend, pity me not I’m one of many
Who spend their lives with a similar lot
Pain free days may be a thing of the past
But my life is still great and I have no regrets
In fact, my life’s been a blast.
Copyright 2008 Bobbi Duffy
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I love the light tone you used throughout this poem, talking about how you slept like a rock when you did sleep, but when you became a mother the slightest sound from your baby woke you. You know, I think that is instinct. Our minds can shut every other noise out, but when we are parents, our mind says that we have another life to take care of, and when that life cries, our mind wakes us up.
This is a strong poem with a strong message and very positive outlook ending. I can really identify with this poem. Thank you for sharing.
May the Lord Jesus bless you, and those whom you love and who love you, and be with you always, and at your side constantly. With much love in my heart, joy to the world, peace on earth & ((((((((((MANY WONDERFUL SISTERLY HUGGGGSSSS)))))))))), your little sister, Barbie
Sandie May :o)
Its hard to live with pain every minute of your life. Prayer works miracle's Bobbi. I also have trouble sleeping, so I can understand how you feel. Heartfelt poetry at its best.
Blessings,
~Linda
Be always safe,
Karen
(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.
Edwin