Slooooowwwwwww (poem) by Ed Matlack on AuthorsDen

Slooooowwwwwww
by Ed Matlack → (All Poetry by Ed Matlack)
Rated "G" by the Author.

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My connection is slow, I am not all herein aglow, My postings could go out faster, Maybe, if I were to get on the line and blow...

SLOOOOOWWWWWWW… My computer runs slower than, A turtle toddling through molasses in winter… My computer Internet Service Provider tells, Me, Ed, you need cable or DSL or a new computer, With all the new components, whistles & bells… The DSL people say I’ve got no service where I do live, Perhaps if you do move, Ed, then we can help; then we can give… I try to get a cable modem to make it faster, It will do as it’s told and call me master, Perhaps it can be on wheels, yes casters… But I am told again, they don’t have it where I am located, Of course I made sure, that is exactly what they stated, For one like I want, it has to be high speed rated… So I have to run my computer on the slowest system, I can get to sleep faster, and onto dreaming in rem, Faster than I can get my computer to move, I just wish the damn thing would get in gear, Get itself right in whatever way, get itself in the groove… © ed ~ 10/23/04

Reviewed by Tien Avielle (Reader)

Reviewed on October 24, 2004

Ditto here, but do as Sherry said. It made an incredible difference to mine. I never realized how it was slowing down, until it just about STOPPED DEAD. Then, running that free program, it was like a new life!

Reviewed by Tinka Boukes

Awwwwwww I feel your frustration..know it all too well!!

Love Tinka

Reviewed by SHERRY HEIM

Just a suggestion, Ed. If you haven't done it, download Ad-Aware, it's free, and run it. When on the net, advertising places dump ad stuff onto your computer that turn it turtle slow. Running this little program will usually give you better speed. There are a couple other things you can do. too, to make it run faster like remove items from your start up. E-mail me if you want me to help you with this. If your system is older, it is going to run a bit slower, but I had Win98 on my old computer with only 128 ram and it still ran fast. Great poem, by the way...I can feel your frustration.
Take care,
Sherry

Reviewed by Katy Walsvik (Reader)

Ahhhhhhhh... the 'age of technology'... PHOOEY! I have DSL and my turtle moves as you've suggested up there, too... only good thing is I can talk on the phone AND be online, which, if you think about it, is rather rude to the person on the phone so there you are. Was that all one sentence? What can I tell you? I ramble. hehe... Don't sweat it, Eddie, me sweet. Imagine having none at all. That's what I do when I get mad at the stupid thing. Sigh...

Look at the bright side... ok, ok... if you find the bright side, take a look at it! (grin) katy xox.

Reviewed by Kate Clifford (Reader)

This can be one of the frustrations of not living in a city. Been there, done that.

Reviewed by Mr. Ed

I can get to sleep faster, and onto dreaming in rem,
Faster than I can get my computer to move

And I can feel your pain, Ed; I used to have the same problem.

But perhaps you have discovered a solution in your statement above. Hook up the computer to your brain while you sleep, and maybe the energy you are producing will make it run faster - sort of like the Frankenstein Experiment - and it is Halloween, after all!!