Still a Virgin...by Rufuz (poem) by Ed Matlack on AuthorsDen

Still a Virgin...by Rufuz
by Ed Matlack → (All Poetry by Ed Matlack)
Rated "G" by the Author.

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While daddy does take yet another nap, I get to write, he will never know unless you open your trap, Very few have I ever at snapped, So you do not have to worry, most of you I find to be good chaps…

Still a Virgin…by Rufuz So still I sit here a virgin in white, (& a little red) See all sorts of bitches in my extended sight, Unable am I when locked in the house to give them delight, Though for myself I am quite showing my personal excite, Herein I will hold back from explaining, as it is only right, Daddy would want me to remain as always polite… On my leash I cannot reach, Oh, the things I could the girls teach, Every now and then I find one on the beach, Dad though doesn’t seem to want me to my virginity impeach… Can somebody please speak to my dad? I love him to death and do not want to hurt him, that would make me sad, But just because he can be celibate, Doesn’t mean I don’t need to find a mate, Maybe I can be with that lady from Wisconsin, She writes so funny, and is small enough for me as well, Or that other lady in Canada both of these named Kate… © ~ Rufuz 5.22.2005

Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner

Reviewed on May 24, 2005

Ed,

Poor Rufuz! Get that dog a lady pup, NOW!!!!!!!!!!!

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla. :)

Reviewed by Sandra Corona

Talk about 'going to the dogs'! I thought August was 'dog daze'! If you can talk, walk and type, Rufuz, you can figure this one out for yourself!!
:)Sandy

Reviewed by SHERRY HEIM

Reviewed on May 22, 2005

ohhh YUCK, Rufuz...just because you are horny, doesn't mean we humans want to help you out like that...you are just going to have to be inventive and figure out how to let yourself our when dad is away..he will never know, though, I can attest...once is NEVER enough.
Take care,
Sherry

Reviewed by Roger Ochs

Remember you can still lick your......

Reviewed by Ronald Hull

Rufus, shame on you, resorting to women! On the other hand, doesn't that fart know that dogs was meant to run free and mate with the girls in heat. If he could feel your pain, like Dr. Phil, he'd let you run loose so that you could pick up Lyme's, get run over by a car, or shot by some meathead. Or worse, the Pound, ohmagawd, the Pound and Euthanasia, a big word for death sentence.

Your fellow Mutt,

Ron

Reviewed by Lori Moore

Tell Ed how you feel... He seems like a very reasonable guy.

Reviewed by Alexandre Arnau

lol, i wonder if my dog ever had this conversation in his head...love the sign, too
-A.

Reviewed by Evelyn Simon

Interesting write, Ed. :0)

Reviewed by Kate Clifford (Reader)

I suspect this has something to do with the steaks Killer Kate give you? :-) or maybe it was the smell of Katy frying? Hunger does bring the urges on :-)

Reviewed by Tinka Boukes

Oh Boy Rufuz i think you have a very big problem!!

I think your daddy is jealous of your charming looks!!

But life is a bitch too...so don't worry to much...okay!!

Love send to you from The otherside of the world!!

Love Tinka