AuthorsDen.com   Join | Login    
Where Authors and Readers come together!

SIGNED BOOKS    AUTHORS    BOOKS    SAMPLE CHAPTERS    AUDIOBOOKS    eBOOKS    STORIES    ARTICLES    POETRY    BLOGS    NEWS    VIDEOS    SUCCESS    TESTIMONIALS

Featured Authors:  R.E.E.S Blogs Linda Smith, Publisher, iRachel Glasgow, iTodd Cheney, iCynth'ya Reed, iShirley Woods, iMaria Rushing, iPaul Lonardo, iAntoinette Kopperfield, iArmineh Ohanian, iWilliam Cottringer, i

  Home > Humor > Poetry        Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry        Authors: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z     

Ed Matlack

 Follow Me  

· Contact Me
· Poetry
· Stories
· Blog
· Messages
· 6,048 Titles
· 45,923 Reviews
· Save to My Library
· Share with Friends!
·
Member Since: Aug, 2003

Ed Matlack, click here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.



Speak the Language or LEAVE…
by Ed Matlack → (All Poetry by Ed Matlack)
   Rated "G" by the Author.
Share   Print  Save   Follow   Share on Facebook


Poem Artwork


Today I dealt with an annoying person,


I ended up ending the conversation,


Before I did succumb to temptation,


And cut out her tongue,


Her lack of English would then worsen…


 


“I am speaking English, sir,”


Then why am I finding it hard to you understand,


“Perhaps, sir, you have too much wax in your ears,”


Where are you from ma’am, and have you had many beers…?


 


Is there a supervisor that I may to speak,


Even without a speech impediment I can tell you are a geek,


I REALLY AM TRYING, I am sorry if I do you all critique,


You will have to excuse me before I kill you I will have to go and take a leak…


© ed J 2/20/08


Want to review or comment on this poem?


Need a FREE Reader Membership?


 Reviews of "Speak the Language or LEAVE…"
Reviewed by Kathy Armijo
Reviewed on March 3, 2008
It is, indeed, most annoying [I'll keep it clean]. But, I do agree with Tinka's review. It is stated most eloquently.

God bless you. Kathy

Reviewed by Tinka Boukes
Reviewed on February 25, 2008
Sha-up....be-quiet...pas-op...ek-praat...luister-NOU!!

Say No Moor!!

Love Stinky

Reviewed on February 21, 2008
ED ... WHERE CAN I ORDER THAT T-SHIRT?

AWWWWWWW ... it's not her fault! The shari-a law Islamo-fascist CEO of the Corporation HIRED HER, didn't he?

and the transposed RECTAL-CRANIAL CONGRESS persons who PROMOTE this travesty, isn't it?

and the APATHY of the MASSES of of public SHEEP who DON'T SAY - BAAAAAAA !!!

Pobrocito! PRESS 3 FOR SELF-DESTRUCT! TK

Reviewed by Don Juan Amante
Reviewed on February 21, 2008
Perhaps Sir, she will learn in time, as many of us had to.

Reviewed by Mr. Ed
Reviewed on February 21, 2008
“Perhaps, sir, you have too much wax in your ears"

I knew it. You're not even using that very expensive ear wax removal kit I sent you for Christmas. Can you send it back? I know someone else who could use it.

Reviewed by Georg Mateos
Reviewed on February 21, 2008
Lill'brother, like very much that T-shirt stuffing, can you send some?

Georg

Reviewed on February 20, 2008
What really gets to me is when making a phone call and machine says "punch 1 for English; punch 2 for Spanish". What's with that??
Did we ever have punch 2 for Dakota, punch 2 for Cherokee, punch 2 for Italian, punch 2 for French, punch 2 for German, punch 2 for Arabic, punch 2 for Yiddish, punch 2 for Swedish or Dutch or Swahili??? I find nothing disrespectful in asking people who come here, legal or illegal(boooo!), to learn ENGLISH.

Ha...see what you started, dear Ed!! :o)

Micke

Reviewed by Ron (sketchman) Axelson (Reader)
Reviewed on February 20, 2008
I agree Ed. They think we are suppose to understand
their jibber jabber.
Don't pee on Rufuz's leg please..
Ron.....

Reviewed by Susan de Vegter
Reviewed on February 20, 2008
Are you in customer Service or is she? It kills me when I was born and raised in this country and go to Customer Service and can't understand the person serving me. I asked for someone who can speak "GOOD" English.
Blessings and love,
Susan

Reviewed on February 20, 2008
YEAH Buddy!! I feel the same way!! If they can't learn our ways, then THEY do NOT need to be here. PERIOD. Don't GET me started on this; I don't need a heart attack or stroke; already have high blood pressure! This is one of my pet peeves!! Very well expressed frustration; I hear ya! Boy, howdy!

(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. :(

To come here is one thing, but PLEASE learn OUR language and speak it when dealing with people who DON'T speak YOUR language!! Do it LEGALLY!!!!!

Reviewed by Scott Zachary
Reviewed on February 20, 2008
I agree totally. If I went to France, I would expect to have to learn their language...they speak Frog, don't they?

It's always fun to read your poems!

Love and kisses to you and Woofie,

Scott

Reviewed on February 20, 2008
Boy, howdy, this one is a loaded gun! LOL Feel the same way - my grandfather was 14 years old when he came to America (to escape the war in Europe), they didn't cater to him, in order to get a job, in order to become a citizen, he had to LEARN THE LANGUAGE and OBEY THE LAWS OF THE LAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hear ya.

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.


New Poetry by Ed Matlack
Popular Poetry (Humor)
  1.  If I Could Be A Super Hero
  2.  Little Folk, Cousins Make A Pit Stop
  3.  Fried Chicken
  4.  Like Ducks in Paper Trousers
  5.  An Adventurous Reinterpretation of Mid
  6.  Milkman's letter
  7.  Laughing As I Flee...
  8.  Amazing Grapes
  9.  Newfangled Things
  10.  A Salt and Batter
  11.  A Writer Named Ron
  12.  Ode to Spamophobia
  13.  Porky Pig And Daffy Duck
  14.  My First Heart Attack
  15.  The Last Second
  16.  Bawdy Stories And A Game Of Bridge
  17.  Houston Greats
  18.  Hound Dog
  19.  AThree Year Old
  20.  Burst Forth
Free Book Review Program
Select a book to read and review today!

Jay Dubya's 53rd Book: PLOTS by Jay Dubya

PLOTS is Jay Dubya's 53rd book that satirizes in adult form major works of Poe, London, O. Henry. Twain and Shakespeare.  
Member BookAds

Thirteen Sick Tasteless Classics, Part II by Jay Dubya

Thirteen Sick Tasteless Classics, Part II is adult literature featuring adult language and situations that satirizes thirteen famous novellas and short stories. It is Jay Dubya's sixteenth ebook.  
Member BookAds

Shakespeare: Slammed, Smeared, Savaged and Slaughtered by Jay Dubya

Shakespeare: Slammed, Smeared, Savaged and Slaughtered (Part I) is adult literature featuring adult content and language.  
Member BookAds