AuthorsDen.com   Join | Login    
Where Authors and Readers come together!

SIGNED BOOKS    AUTHORS    BOOKS    SAMPLE CHAPTERS    AUDIOBOOKS    eBOOKS    STORIES    ARTICLES    POETRY    BLOGS    NEWS    VIDEOS    SUCCESS    TESTIMONIALS

Featured Authors:  Bob Boze, iGary Caplan, iRaven West, iEmmanuel Laroche, iSam Vaknin, iMiller Caldwell, iLinda Frank, iMaria Rushing, iCynth'ya Reed, iJudith Bailey, i

  Home > Humor > Poetry        Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry        Authors: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z     

Ed Matlack

 Follow Me  

· Contact Me
· Poetry
· Stories
· Blog
· Messages
· 6,048 Titles
· 45,923 Reviews
· Save to My Library
· Share with Friends!
· Member Since: Aug, 2003

Ed Matlack, click here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.



Awwww, nuts...
by Ed Matlack → (All Poetry by Ed Matlack)
   Rated "G" by the Author.
Share   Print  Save   Follow   Share on Facebook

Trying to stay out of those doldrums...




Poem Artwork

The squirrel said it,

But I would say oh sh**,

I can’t find my nuts,

They were right there next to my butt…

 

Can ya look around,

See if they are near on the ground,

Sometimes nuts do abound,

But of course not today,

Oh goodness, my mind is not too sound…

 

Can’t say I am crazy,

Can’t say I am insane,

I only lost my little nuts,

I really am, aren't I, a klutz…J
Want to review or comment on this poem?

Need a FREE Reader Membership?


 Reviews of "Awwww, nuts..."
Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on October 9, 2011
"Feeling a bit crazy? Reach a bit deeper, and you'll feel nuts." Bob Hope

Ron
Reviewed by Patrick Granfors
Reviewed on October 5, 2011
How many times do I have to tell you not to wear ma's panty hose???? Jeeeze. Cuz p.
Reviewed by Gene Williamson
Reviewed on October 5, 2011
Ouch! Be careful where you walk, Ed. Some nuts
don't grow on trees.
Reviewed by Mary Lacey Desertrat
Reviewed on October 5, 2011
Ed,

You ARE nuts!! Love ya.

Mary
Reviewed by Christine Tsen
Reviewed on October 5, 2011
An affectionate poem of splendid imagery!
:)
Reviewed by William Bonilla
Reviewed on October 5, 2011
A Kool Write Ed
Dig your new bio Pic......
Is that you Ed? Or is that John Wayne?
its great reading you again
Peace be with you Brother

William
Reviewed by Tom poesyco.th@gmail.com
Reviewed on October 4, 2011
JOISEY ...

PER PEEWEE'S ANNOUNCEMENT BELOW ... I'LL BID $10.

IF I WIN ... WILL SQUASH SAID NUTS WITH A HUGE MALL-HAMMER!

OUCH !!! MILD-MANNERED CUZ TK ...
Reviewed by Paul Berube
Reviewed on October 4, 2011
You've got waaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy too much time on your hands, Ed.
Reviewed by Rose Rideout
Reviewed on October 4, 2011
Sad for a little fello to lose his nuts LOL. Funny one Ed.

Newfie Hugs, Rose
Reviewed by neerja gandhi (Reader)
Reviewed on October 4, 2011
tee heeee heeeeheeeee
Reviewed by Laura Fall
Reviewed on October 4, 2011
A humorous poem well done indeed as the imagery is great Laura
Reviewed by Annabel Sheila
Reviewed on October 4, 2011
Hahahaha! Hilarious! Thanks, Ed!

Anna
Reviewed by Mr. Ed
Reviewed on October 4, 2011
This Just In From Jackson, NJ - the young boy and his terrified dog who had spotted a strange hairy creature squatting in some bushes in the forest near his home the other day is now reporting that his dog just found two extremely hairy, smelly, shriveled up nuts. He thinks that they just might belong to the old Jersey Devil himself, and he's gonna auction them off on E-Bay!
New Poetry by Ed Matlack
Poem Image
My many years with Authors Den will come to a close in May, thank you to all that has reviewed of me, I hope you all continue on to your own end...
Most likely my END or maybe NOT!
Poem Image
Yep, it''s that time of the year again, break out the credit card...
Merry Christmas...
Poem Image
We all got em''...
The Saggy, Baggy Boobs Blues,
Poem Image
Growing up alone is not so bad...
Alone in life...
Poem Image
Memories I am Unable to Forget...
Poem Image
To wish for death...
Poem Image
I find it interesting that only in the wee hours of the morning is when I find myself able to write anymore... <br>
Rain, thunder & lightning, oh my...
Poem Image
Hey, I think I might have found a little humor...?
...NEAT...
Popular Poetry (Humor)
  1.  If I Could Be A Super Hero
  2.  Little Folk, Cousins Make A Pit Stop
  3.  Fried Chicken
  4.  Like Ducks in Paper Trousers
  5.  An Adventurous Reinterpretation of Mid
  6.  Milkman's letter
  7.  Laughing As I Flee...
  8.  Amazing Grapes
  9.  Newfangled Things
  10.  A Salt and Batter
  11.  A Writer Named Ron
  12.  Ode to Spamophobia
  13.  Porky Pig And Daffy Duck
  14.  My First Heart Attack
  15.  The Last Second
  16.  Bawdy Stories And A Game Of Bridge
  17.  Houston Greats
  18.  Hound Dog
  19.  AThree Year Old
  20.  Burst Forth
Free Book Review Program
Select a book to read and review today!

Shakespeare: Slammed, Smeared, Savaged and Slaughtered, Part II by Jay Dubya

Shakespeare: Slammed, Smeared, Savaged and Slaughtered, Part II is adult literature that satirizes ten famous William Shakespeare plays.  
Member BookAds

Twain: Tattered, Trounced, Tortured and Traumatized by Jay Dubya

Author Jay Dubya satirizes 20 Mark Twain stories in adult language and content.  
Member BookAds

Shakespeare: Slammed, Smeared, Savaged and Slaughtered, Part II by Jay Dubya

Shakespeare: Slammed, Smeared, Savaged and Slaughtered, Part II is adult literature that satirizes ten famous William Shakespeare plays.  
Member BookAds
Authors A-Z: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Featured Authors New to AuthorsDen? Add AuthorsDen to Your Site Share AD Need Help? About Us

Problem with this page?   Report it to AuthorsDen
AuthorsDen, Inc. All rights reserved.