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Blogs by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner
blog, blog, bloggin', blog, blog, bloggin' aloooong :) 7/8/2003 4:59:28 PM
I love jokes...as long as they're funny, and *fairly*
clean, I love 'em.
Here's a few I've heard recently...hope you enjoy 'em
as much as I did:
Whaddaya call a yellow Hummer? a YUMMER
And a purple (plum) one? that's a PLUMMER
When you buy a Hummer, you suddenly find you have many
friends you didn't know you had...they are called
CHUMMERS ('cause they all wanna ride in your Hummer)
Whaddaya git when your Hummer breaks down? A BUMMER
And the guy who's gotta hitch to git it fixed?? He's
a THUMMER.
The drunk in your Hummer is called...yep. A RUMMER.
(It don't have to be the driver, though.)
And the last one (YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!)...this is the
best *tee hee*
There is a bear. A big, thirsty bear. He's in Bil-
ings, Montana. He goes into a bar, this thirsty bear
does, and demands a beer.
"Gimme a beer."
The bartender tells the bear, "I'm sorry, we don't
serve beer to bears in bars in Billings."
The bear gits a bit annoyed. "I want a beer. NOW."
The bartender says, "Didn't you hear me? We don't
serve beer to bears in bars in Billings."
The bear is gettin mad. "ROARRR...I want a beer. I'm
thirsty, and I've got the money."
The bartender roars right back: "We DON'T serve BEER
to BOORISH BEARS in BARS in BILLINGS."
The bear is beyond mad. He's positively wild. :) He
demands a beer. NOW. RIGHT now.
The bartender says, "What part of 'no' don't you under-
stand??? We DON'T serve BEER to BOORISH, BULLYING
BEARS in BARS in BILLINGS!!!!"
The bear says, "You see that woman sittin at the end of
the bar? You don't serve me a beer...RIGHT NOW...I'm
gonna go over there and eat her up. It will be YOUR
responsibility" (tryin a little guilt trip).
The bartender says, "LISTEN TO ME CLOSE, BEAR: WE
DO NOT SERVE BEER TO BOORISH, BULLYING, BELLIGERANT
BEARS IN BARS IN BILLINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
The bear keeps his promise: he goes to the end of the
bar and *snap* *crack* *chompchompchomp*, EATS the wom-
an that was sittin there!
The bear then says, "Are ya gonna give me that beer?"
The bartender says, "I can't beLIEVE you did that. We
don't serve beer to boorish, bullying, belligerant bears
in bars in billings...especially if they are on drugs."
The bear says, "Heeeeeyyy...wait a minnit...I don't use
drugs!"
The bartender says, "o, yes, you do...because that was
a barbitchyouate."
*i like to have died laughin when i heard these!*
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More Blogs by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner Back Home - Wednesday, April 21, 2010 Won't be on for a while -- - Saturday, April 10, 2010 One For The Record Books - Thursday, February 11, 2010 Taking a Break ... - Wednesday, January 27, 2010 The Death Of Liberty - Monday, December 21, 2009 Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid. - Sunday, December 20, 2009 What I'm Thankful For ... - Tuesday, November 24, 2009 American WHAT Awards? - Monday, November 23, 2009 Poetry Reading - Wednesday, November 11, 2009 Veteran's Day Message, 2009 - Monday, November 9, 2009 Nero Is Fiddlin' ... - Wednesday, October 28, 2009 Last Poem - Thursday, October 8, 2009 Okay? - Saturday, September 19, 2009 Hurry Up And Wait - Monday, July 27, 2009 Disaster Drill 2009, Burleson, Texas - Thursday, June 25, 2009 Tornado Drill - Wednesday, June 17, 2009 Thought It Was Time ... - Saturday, June 6, 2009 Didn't Read Your Obituary - Where Are You? - Monday, May 18, 2009 Spring Has Sprung - I Think. - Saturday, April 4, 2009 Lesson Learned From Mockingbird - Friday, March 20, 2009 The Goal of A Writer is ... - Monday, March 16, 2009 Fall is Here (The Aftermath) - Friday, March 6, 2009 Not All Are Treated Equal - Sunday, February 15, 2009 Happy Valentine's Day - Thursday, February 12, 2009 Tribute to Bonnie May - Monday, February 2, 2009 84 and 89 Reads, 13 Reviews on Last Two Poems? - Wednesday, January 21, 2009 2,700 - Friday, January 9, 2009 Pray Your Day Was .... - Thursday, December 25, 2008 Taking a Break - Saturday, November 1, 2008 Severe Weather Deterrent - Tuesday, October 28, 2008 Who's Getting Stimulated? Not I ... Not Even A Buzz! - Wednesday, October 1, 2008 Counting Blessings! - Monday, September 29, 2008 Let Me Know ... - Monday, July 28, 2008 Me? Brave?? - Monday, July 14, 2008 Dud - Monday, July 7, 2008 Everyone Needs A Break Today - Saturday, June 28, 2008 Thoughts On Turning 49 - Officially ... - Thursday, June 26, 2008 Blogspot - Saturday, May 3, 2008 Taking A Break - Saturday, February 9, 2008 TV Made Me Do It Air Date Scheduled! - Saturday, December 15, 2007 Nasty Day Here In North Central Texas - Wednesday, December 12, 2007 Off To The Races ... - Saturday, November 3, 2007 TV Made Me Do It: Take Two! - Wednesday, October 3, 2007 It's Heeeeeerrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeee - Tuesday, October 2, 2007 Tomorrow...TV Made Me Do It! - Sunday, September 30, 2007 Doesn't Add Up - Wednesday, September 26, 2007 Hitting the Century Mark - Tuesday, September 25, 2007 TV Time - Tuesday, September 25, 2007 I've Forgotten ... - Tuesday, September 18, 2007 POEM: They Ate Candy - Wednesday, September 12, 2007 MERRY CHRISTMAS - Friday, December 22, 2006 GOD, I Love Writing! - Saturday, February 4, 2006 Happy Anniversary - Friday, September 10, 2004 Where Were You? - Wednesday, September 10, 2003 There Is Nothing I Can Say (CHALLENGE) - Monday, August 25, 2003 life is like a rollercoaster... - Tuesday, July 15, 2003 blog, blog, bloggin', blog, blog, bloggin' aloooong :) - Tuesday, July 8, 2003 gettin' older - Saturday, July 5, 2003 I Want One Now (The Hummer Song) - Wednesday, July 2, 2003 y'all have a safe and happy fourth of july - Wednesday, July 2, 2003 still think i'm funny? - Tuesday, July 1, 2003
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