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Patrick A Granfors

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Ten Minutes of Fame - Lifetime Badge of Honor
by Patrick A Granfors → (All Poetry by Patrick A Granfors)
   Rated "G" by the Author.
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One of my favorite “sporting events” may be compromised this 4th of July over a contract dispute. Nathan’s Famous International Hot Dog Eating Contest winner for the past three years, Joey Chestnut may not have to face his long time rival Takeru Kobayshi, who has six victories under his …ahem… belt. Last year Joey ate 68 hotdogs in the ten minutes allowed, including five in the final minute compared to Takeru’s paltry showing of 64-1/2.

Photo:Joey Chestnut,Wegotthegoodz.wordpress.com


Poem Artwork

Joey is my hero

The one true King of glut

The fastest man on planet earth

To stuff hotdogs in his gut

 

I’d fail this competition

And turn the other cheek

He eats in ten minutes

More than I could in a week

 

Now considering the aftermath

There’s no way to pretend

It has to be unholy what

Comes out the other end

 

 

 

Copyright 2010 Patrick Granfors

 


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 Reviews of "Ten Minutes of Fame - Lifetime Badge of Honor"
Reviewed by Regis Auffray
Reviewed on July 5, 2010
"Food" for thought... ...or not! I appreciate your sense of humor, Patrick; thank you for sharing it. Love and peace to you,

Regis

Reviewed on July 5, 2010
Bleah. This one kinda left me full ... LOL! Well done.

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.

Reviewed by E T Waldron
Reviewed on July 5, 2010
Always leave us laughing ,you're a true comic!;-)excellent poem!

Reviewed by Mary Patterson
Reviewed on July 5, 2010
Enjoyed this one Patrick.. Our local TV station also showed the winner. Yes , we do like All Beef Hotdogs!!!!!They are as tradional as Apple Pie!......M

Reviewed by Connie Faust
Reviewed on July 3, 2010
Patrick---Yuck!
I never did like hot dogs. Burgers rule!
Connie

Reviewed by Annabel Sheila
Reviewed on July 3, 2010
Hahahahahaha!!!! Not a very good visual, Patrick!!!! giggle...you crack me up!

Anna

Reviewed by Mr. Ed
Reviewed on July 3, 2010
Unholy, Indeed!

Reviewed by Georg Mateos
Reviewed on July 3, 2010
All was well until that last line! Hot Dogs gonna get not a pretty picture anymore! (LOL)

Georg


Reviewed on July 3, 2010
I think contests like this are disgusting. But this is a darn good write; well done, Patrick!

(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. :P

I'll pass on the hot dogs ... URP! LOL

Reviewed by Ed Matlack
Reviewed on July 2, 2010
Bet you'd be right there with a camera to see what came out the other end, maybe you'd get a picture of the year with it...e

Reviewed on July 2, 2010
I heard Takeru gone on a diet, it'll save some poor swine won't it?

Reviewed by D Johnson
Reviewed on July 2, 2010
You see, I had Nathan's for lunch today...then you create this visual that no one needs to see, at either end...nice going Patrick. Fortunately, I had my 2 pints of Heinekins to wash them down...

Cheers and belches,
Dan

Reviewed by Peter Schlosser (Reader)
Reviewed on July 2, 2010
Unholy is right. His poor wife!

Reviewed by Richard King
Reviewed on July 2, 2010
This is a nice little diversion and so nicely put, well except for coming out the other end part. Could’a done without that vision, right here just before lunch time. Don't think I'll be ordering hot dogs for a while. Thanks for the grins.... Dick

Reviewed by John Bidwell
Reviewed on July 2, 2010
Very well done. I mean the poem- don't know how the hot dogs were.
Guess it doesn't matter. They were not exactly savored.
That must be why they do it with hot dogs.

John

Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on July 2, 2010
Chuckles. It's amazing what we will do to amuse ourselves.

"Eat your beef, they are starving in India."

Ron

Reviewed by Sage Sweetwater
Reviewed on July 2, 2010
Ten Minutes of Fame - Lifetime Badge of Honor is once again a foot-long metaphor, Patrick!

mezzanine of the
hall of poets besmirched,
clogged bidet from diabolus,
corrupt sphincters forcing elimination,
torn popeholy, flimflam rectums,

disloyal covert sect,
breached liasion, spiritual
extortion skewered on the
roasting turnspit, literary carnage
at the expense of detestation,

harpsichord of obedience
plays off tune, defiance casts
the creme de menthe French rune,
oral sex with a smattering of creme
de menthe liquor in the poetic whore's
mouth,

rave on Buddy Holly,
showstopper in the cathouse,
merkin, pubic hair wig for the theatrical
purpose of crotch-sucking dilettantes who can't
place their work into the marketplace honestly...

Rave on...


Copyright 2007 Ms. Sage Sweetwater, firebrand lesbian novelist

Reviewed by Mark Lichterman
Reviewed on July 2, 2010
Hey, you and me, between us, I'm sure we can polish off at least four of those Chicago style, Kosher style Vienna hot dogs, including fries... Still waiting for you, pal.
Mark

Reviewed by Paul Berube
Reviewed on July 2, 2010
Definitely different, Patrick. But well done.


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