Rubber Sheets…

Only do I use rubber for my bed,

So much easier for me to remember, especially with my head,

Just take them outside, spray them off with a hose,

No fuss, no muss, no cuss on the part of the laundress, no reason to discuss…

They are very gray in color, hence the color of this write,

No one can tell me that they are dirty; oh such a sight,

As they are such a breeze to clean;

No need to even hang them off of the trees,

I also use them in my rubber room when visiting there,

They seem to appreciate it that I want to have them,

As the medications they give me, makes me pee so much, I wonder where…

They are good when, er, uh, doing the nasty with the self or whomever,

No stains get on the good linen, although rubber sheets are somewhat bare,

But they keep you cool in the heat of the night, yes, I herein do declare,

And make it easy to slide out of bed, and move over to the chair,

Also lined in rubber, as it seems fitting, and only just so fair…

Maybe a business for rubber sheets could be started,

A market seems to be interested already, seems it could be pretty steady,

I could use it on a commercial or advertisement, showing off what can be done,

Mothers would buy them for their sons, around that special age of puberty,

No more soiled linens, no more embarrassment for the son,

I am very serious here; I do not make a pun, no, absolutely none…

              © ed – 4/7/04