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Ed Matlack

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Member Since: Aug, 2003

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Surgery...
by Ed Matlack → (All Poetry by Ed Matlack)
   Rated "G" by the Author.
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Poem Artwork

Have to get cut,

In the area of my butt,

My prostate is giving me fits,

Fortunately I can still take sh***…J

 

Insurance wont of it cover,

Of medicaid I am not a lover,

Hopefully I can of better insurance discover,

But I really can’t complain,

I got it for free, considering who does in the presidential office, reign…J

 

So back again I go under the knife,

Or do they use a tube into my, er, uh, well you know,

Hope they put me to sleep, as that seems it could smart,

But if they go through the backend, they just better be forewarned,

Because when I do pass gas, boy do I make the BIGgest stinkiest fart…J

© ed – 10/14/13

 

 


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 Reviews of "Surgery..."
Reviewed on October 15, 2013
I don't know which I liked better.............your poem or Ron's review!

Love ya!

Jane

Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on October 15, 2013
They're all wrong and full of you know what. Since you've been so honest… Especially about gases and other mentionables, I'll tell you what they're really going to do… Based on your funds.

First, they'll give you some rotgut whiskey to drink. After you get a little sloppy drunk from it, they'll hit you in the head with a rubber mallet to put you out gently. And then they'll make sure you're all naked… Get out the straight razor and shave every hair off your buff bod. Washing the same razor carefully so as to kill all the cooties, they'll cut you from your arse to your sternum just to make sure that they “get all of it” and it won't come back. As soon as they're through, they'll lace you up with piano wire real tight so your farts will sing.

You will be healed in time for the Chinese erection in November, but you won't have to worry about them anymore.

Ron

Reviewed on October 15, 2013
Dear Knave Knucklehead ...

Just Luv ED P's poem... Beethoven indeed... more like...

TAPS !!! Rots of Ruck ... Bunkie !!!

Reviewed by William Bonilla
Reviewed on October 15, 2013
they will sedate you you will be conscious
unless you are not cover by the other care
Peace brother, only your dignity will be hurting

William

Reviewed by Lark Pogue
Reviewed on October 15, 2013
Ed, I really wish you would stop beating around the bush and be a little more straight forward.
Seriously, good luck with surgery. Wish we could get help here in Texas, but you have to be a pregnant female or a child if you can't afford medical insurance. And, NO, I will not get pregnant to get foot surgery.
L

Reviewed by Paul Berube
Reviewed on October 15, 2013
Good luck with that, Ed. Everything will come out alright in the end.

Reviewed by George Carroll
Reviewed on October 15, 2013
Hope all turns out OK

Reviewed by Mr. Ed
Reviewed on October 15, 2013
boy, do I make the BIGgest stinkiest fart…

Boy, Do We Concur, and if you need us to sign an affidavit, just let us know:

Signed,
Ma
Pee Wee
Cuz Cur
And The 8 Million Residents of New Jersey


Reviewed by E Phillips
Reviewed on October 14, 2013
They treat your prostate with radiation
or they cut your belly wide open
But if they go up your chute with a big long flute
They won't be playing Beethoven!


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