The Farm

By Jim Stewart C 1995

Yeah, I'm a farmer

I know I don't look like it

But I got a spread south of town.

I tried raising okra, corn and squash

But that turned to hell.

So I turned to raising cattle

That turned to hell too

So I decided that I was just going to raise hell.

I had so much hell on my hands

That I was giving it to all my friends and relatives.

In fact I did so good, I decided to put in a double crop

So I could give twice as much hell to all my friends and relatives.

I got a letter from the head of the agriculture department

Asking me to come on in.

I put on my cleanest pair of tennis shoes and my brightest Hawaiian shirt

I walked on into his office with biggest smile on my face

Knowing I was the best hell raiser around.

I sat down and looked at him and he looked at me

I said, "You seen my farm?"

Yeah, It looks like hell.

I guess I'm doing something right.