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Retta (Reindeer) Mckenzie

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Member Since: Sep, 2002

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A Good Day To Die...
by Retta (Reindeer) Mckenzie → (All Poetry by Retta (Reindeer) Mckenzie)
  
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* Note: Among the people of my Clan, To die with honor…or in battle, is consider a good way to die. This was written in response to a challenge at another site...






The storm roars about me,
But I am deaf to her,
Calling her a level 5 hurricane,
Means nothing compared to what I’ve seen…
The hand of God was played tonight,
The devil gave his due-
Damn, the destruction I have seen,
The bodies that I have viewed…
We ran in to save what we could,
But the building was substandard-
And the walls just shook…

It was when the floor began to rock,
That I understood at last-
And though I called His name aloud,
It wasn’t him I mocked…

Death came with a leering grin,
And I started asking God to forgive me,
When I heard a mighty roar,
And saw what looked like a door
Come flying by me like a kite,
Atop it like some magic carpet,
Rode a child eyes wide with fear-

I couldn’t believe what I was doing,
Reached out and plucked her from her doom,
And heard the devil screaming for my blood,
As the walls came tumbling down…

But God was watching too,
And stuck out his foot,
Tripped the evil demon
Clutching the child to his breast!

She flew from his arms,
And landed against my chest,
I clutched her like a football,
Fell to my knees as the ceiling fell
And kissed the floor-

Crumbling panels all around me,
I rolled with the child under an old wooden desk,
And there I held her as we both wept…

When they finally pulled us from the rubble,
She was stuck to me like glue,
And I looked into her eyes,
Not knowing what to do…

She reached up her tiny hand,
And touched my soiled face,
Smiled and cuddled closer,
Refusing to let go of her embrace…

Never even felt the pain,
As they made me lay down,
Wondering what the hell they meant,
When they said I’d be alright…

There was nothing wrong with me!
It was the child I wanted them to see!
Then the lightning flashed and stayed,
And the night turned into day,
Suddenly I realize;
Damn,
This was a good day to die…



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 Reviews of "A Good Day To Die..."
Reviewed by Melissa Rives
Reviewed on May 13, 2003
You have a powerful voice.. a most excellent story-teller as well! Awesome!

Reviewed by Bhuwan Thapaliya
Reviewed on May 13, 2003
Very powerful write...one of ure best...love n luck...BHUWAN

Reviewed by Tinka Boukes
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
Excellent write and imagery!!

Reviewed by Jack Roberts
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
Great job Retta!

Jack

Reviewed by Birdie Houston (Reader)
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
Swooping write blew me away ! Great work !

Reviewed on May 12, 2003
great story in these well describe lines...

God bless,
Tim

Reviewed by Bobbi Duffy
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
Reindeer, this is fabulous, I was enthralled. To live will makes us proud,to die well makes us heroes.
Bobbi

Reviewed by jude forese
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
very powerful, provocative write!

Reviewed by Lady Peg (Reader)
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
Reindeer,
"There was nothing wrong with me!
It was the child I wanted them to see!
Then the lightning flashed and stayed,
And the night turned into day,
Suddenly I realize;
Damn,
This was a good day to die…"
stunning verses
peggy

Reviewed by Kate Clifford (Reader)
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
To save a life by giving life is about the most honourable way I can think of dying. Wonderful write!

Reviewed on May 12, 2003
Hi Retta:

This was awesome write! Great description indeed!

Sandie Angel :o) a.k.a. May Lu $*_*$

Reviewed on May 12, 2003
Ohhh wow, powerful! ~Kerry

Reviewed by William Bonilla
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
outstnading Retta
an excellent write
Wonderful reading

William ... love & peace

Reviewed by Ted Sheridan (Reader)
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
Wonderful work from you.

Reviewed by *********** ********** (Reader)
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
I agree with Tony....you're too talented not to be in print.....ty, Dani

Reviewed on May 12, 2003
powerful, intense story! as i was reading it, i could envision the storm's fury, especially that of an F-5 tornado; was thinking of the recent tornado outbreak as i read this riveting write! outstanding write, reindeer! ((((HUGS))) :(

Reviewed by Tony Nerone (Reader)
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
Dear Retta, This one is my favorite now. The last several writings of yours have
been extra Excellent!
I think you should really try hard to publish. IMHO


YF tony

Reviewed on May 12, 2003
WOW...this built up in intensity, like a catagory 5 hurricane...WOW! its rhythm, flow, meter, and subject matter just blew me away! GREAT job...*STANDING OVATION* (((HUGS))) and love, karla. :)

Reviewed by - - - - - TRASK
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
5-12-03

Our's Is To Do Or Die, Our's Is Not To Reason Why, Only To Try Before Die(ing)...

TRASK

Reviewed by Steve Ralph
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
what a fantastic story, full of excitment, love and fear,
i could almost feel the walls shaking..
thank you for sharing,,
steve

Reviewed by Joseph* OneLight*® (Reader)
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
What a powerful, magnificent story!

~Joseph

Reviewed by E T Waldron
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
Always you give your all, you are a gift to poetry!

Reviewed by Jill Eisnaugle
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
This is so powerful, forceful and mighty. Breathtaking, indeed.
Good job, Reindeer.
Jill :)

Reviewed by Shadow Writer (Reader)
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
a worthy write, strong in emotions... well written.

Reviewed by Christine Morell
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
This took my breath away, Reindeer. You're so gifted.
Chrissie

Reviewed by Elizabeth Taylor (Reader)
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
This is a magnificent work, Retta. A hero is a warrior who trys. Bravo.

Reviewed by xxx xxx (Reader)
Reviewed on May 12, 2003
wow rein so dramatic, so wonderfully taut, so desriptive, so everything lol. i just was taken completely away by this one darling .


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