Yikes, never thought of the Pearly gates being narrow. Okay, no more frenchries or rum.

(Might as well go to hell!)
rege

Laughing right along with you. However, we humans seem very prone to addiction. Almost every addiction (except poetry writing–maybe?) is unhealthy and leads to an early demise. For some strange reason I've avoided almost all addictions except the willingness to try to do and see as much as possible within time limitations and still get a good night's sleep.

My cousin loves to eat so much and is so obsessive compulsive about everything that she bloomed into a monster she didn't like. Therefore, she had her stomach stapled then returned to a size 6. Unfortunately, her stomach has stretched again and she is now back to two thirds of her monster weight.

We all have to die sometime. Some of us just want to do it early by getting in the insidious cycles of self abuse. I think I'll go masturbate and think about it.

Ron ;-)

Very sad story...the poor man had an obvious addiction to the wrong kind of food...But your lighthearted point of view is once again awesome!

Anna

We all have the choice what we put in our mouth. Great poem Patrick! You can apply humor in everything you write making the subject a little more light. Take care, and god bless! ~Chessly

Something tells me i'm not supposed to laugh
but...'worth dying for'...just can't help it..
take those pearly gates off the hinges,
there's a long queue forming.
Thank you, Patrick.

John

I told my mum at four years old I was not going to eat the moo mooing cows.
You are so amusing and never-a-dull-moment in your poetry Patrick!!!
Infused with humor, proof of being fully alive.
Be well,
Christine

He was the 575 lb spokesperson for a local restaurant “The Heart Attack Grill”.

Truly amazing how our heroes have changed so much over the years,
No wonder we've become an Obese Nation, devouring all, with no fear.

I love your sense of humor and I think I read something about it. It is sad that he is now dead, but you could say "He did it his way!"

Be always safe,
Karen

Sad yes; but you find a way to express a sad truth while still managing to keep your sense of humor and eliciting smiles from your readers. Thank you, Patrick. Love and peace to you,

Regis

there is humor in these sad words.

dan

There is a special heaven for people of excessive weight,
Before they go to the main heaven they have to wait,
They have to prove that they can lose the pounds,
And drop some of that fat & no longer eat the candy bar, Mounds...e

i guess i have my work cut out for me then, never like to miss out on a free lunch!

Okay! Okay, already! So I'll give up my three big Macs for a couple of Burger Kings... Okay, so I'll pass on the french fries... Well, maybe an order of onion rings?
Mark

Nice job, Patrick.

Sounds like poetic justice to me.

I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Really.
Awesome poem though.

John