Upchuck Varmint (poem) by Patrick A Granfors on AuthorsDen

Upchuck Varmint
by Patrick A Granfors → (All Poetry by Patrick A Granfors)
Rated "G" by the Author.

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For those of you familiar with the challenges I have had with our backyard spa, the saga continues. Remember how your mom always said not to go swimming for an hour after eating? There is a reason and it�s not what you think. Yesterday Kali joined us for a refreshing afternoon spa shortly after her dinner. Not long afterwards, her dinner joined us too.

There wasn’t any place to run There wasn’t any place to hide Rumbling out of Kali’s gullet Her Kibble began to slide You’d think she might have turned her head To spare us summer grief Instead it was just bombs away Much to her relief I had just changed the water And fixed a wire a squirrel had chewed The temperature was perfect A pleasant spa was screwed Instead we dodged the kibble A swirling slick of brownish paste A calming soothing afternoon Had just become a waste Looking back it’s funny now We made it through the worst But this is further evidence I think my spa is cursed Copyright 2011 Patrick Granfors

Reviewed by Ronald Hull

Reviewed on September 18, 2011

Reminds me of the time my brother's cocker spaniel doing this in a very hot tub on a cold Arizona night. I couldn't understand how that dog, its eyes half closed, could enjoy all that heat.

You have a way of capturing life's little foibles in humorous poems. Enjoyed.

Ron

Reviewed by Chip Bergeron

Reviewed on September 6, 2011

Sounds like one ofmour cats.....hisd favorite relative is his uncle "ralph."

Chip Bergeron

Reviewed by Annabel Sheila

Giggle....I hear ya' Patrick! So sorry to hear your spa date turned sour, but at least Kali felt better...giggle....I had a cat one time that would run all over the house to find a carpet or mat to honk a furball...no way he'd drop it on the floor where it would be so much easier to clean up! giggle

Anna

Reviewed by Richard King

Reviewed on September 5, 2011

I always thought that was Kibbles N Bits not Kibbles N Bitch, or maybe Kibbles N Wretch? You think the spa is cursed, but I'm of the opinion that Kali probably heard one or two as well. Bet you'll muddle through somehow. Dick

Reviewed by Mark Lichterman

Very funny... Or maybe not so funny. I guess dogs and other varmints just don't have the manners humans... or most humans should have... unless drunk or stoned or something.

Mark

Reviewed by Paul Berube

Outhouse sounds about right.

Reviewed by Lonnie Hicks

It's possible but you'd miss the fun!

Reviewed by Jerry Bolton (Reader)

Yuk.

Reviewed by Ed Matlack

I don't think its the spa, I think its you...maybe you should rebuild it into an outhouse, good usage in that...e

Reviewed by JASMIN HORST SEILER

The poor pooch, what kind of kibble was it, I'd sue, after all it probably don't read, no swimming after eating, does it, one way to turn that curse around Patrick, it be a start...........Blessings!

Reviewed by Eileen Granfors

Ha ha! Do not overfeed the dogs. eg