Beat me, slap me, grope me, so I will know total horror before I die…

Your face could only be described,

As a place where someone with a mallet did scribe,

Your bedside manner makes me think you did come from a cannibal tribe,

Hey what are you doing with that machete and meat cleaver,

No you cannot around my neck circumscribe…

Oh my god, your hands are like ice,

Why do you have fangs like that in your mouth?

And your nails can only be described as claws,

Made to do with them like knives that slice…

Did you make up your hair like that?

Or did you forget to take off your hat?

Did you know that that nurse’s outfit makes you look fat?

What’s that walking around behind you, oh no, a black cat…

Where did you get your nursing degree?

From Dracula’s College for Blood Suckers; hope it was for free,

Now about this beating the sh** out of me,

I would prefer an enema, what do they cost?

On second thought my stay in this bed has ended,

Now let me get up before they do cut out my brain,

And I will never ever be able to leave here, I will be forever lost…

                © ed ~ 11/23/04