This is written in haiku meter. It is dedicated to someone who is hard to describe in mere words.
When the winter wind Stirs through the dark barren trees It whispers of you
I can barely breathe When your picture comes upon The screen of my mind Unavoidably When someone mentions your name I lose a heartbeat I can scarce believe How empty my world appears Without you in it In another realm In dreams when I speak with you You give me purpose Now in the darkness It is easy to fathom The light that you shined In humility I admit my lack of strength Without your presence It's hard not to fall In the void you left behind When you had to leave There is not a time When I do not think of you Know this is the truth My friend I miss you There is emptiness within Each passing moment The absence of you Is a constant throbbing ache Deep within my soul I shall not be healed Until we can meet again Our friendship confirmed
ABSOLUTELY PERFECT...IN EVERY WAY! THOUGH DONE QUITE A WHILE AGO, THIS IS ENTIRELY ...YOU AND SO ENJOYED! THANKS FOR SHARING, REGIS. LOVE, BLESSINGS AND FAITH...HIS+INSPIRATIONS
The haiu format is amazing, and understandable, clearly thought out. Each tells of a part of something that is missing to you, in all but a few. I feel your concern on this one, and know it's great to let us read and ponder over things happening like this.
"I can scarce believe" - Now I am may be incorrect here but I believe the correct word would be scarcely.
It is clever to write a poem where each stanza is in haiku format. Also must be a hard thing to master. For you might have been easy to do. But we'll never know. Not unless you tell us. :-)
I must admit that when I read each stanza I don't always feel a smooth flow from one stanza to the next in terms of creating one unified poem. Sometimes it feels like some stanzas are on their own as stand alone poems. Still, the entire piece is enjoyable and in parts moving. Emotion is present throughout as well. Thanks for sharing.
Regis, I am honoured that you would put my poem 'Inevitable' on the level of this masterpiece. 'It is hard not to fall in the void you left behind...' I wish that I could have conjured these lines, they express the soul of what I was trying to articulate in 'Inevitable'. Thank you also for your uplifting comments, Dave
Regis,
These are beautiful, and any friend/lover would be proud to be their target. The third one is the one I relate most to. I know that feeling of anticipation. Time stands still while you wait to see if the words following the name will be negative or positive. Then...can you mask your feelings over the outcome, should you need to.... Very meaningful poems. Hugs,
Sheila
Reg, structurally perfect and warm and open in feeling, a heart laid bare. For me, the second stanza is particularly rich and the poem as a whole makes a true impact.
John
This of course has touched me deeply and hit home too true how much a person can impact your life even when they are no longer with us as you know from reading the story about my brother. Very well written!
Laura
Reviewed by Rafika Anderson (Reader)
Reviewed on December 25, 2007
Regis, this poem touched me deep within my soul. I feel for you and with you. I too have known such devastating loss and shared this profound sentiment of absence that you write of as you must know from reading my work ("Mass for Athena" and "The Night You Left Me.") I love the closing verse, which glimmers with a hint of hope.
I shall frame this one Regis, it is all soul,deeply loving, and universal, it certainly touches me deeply, and shall not read another for a while till I have fortified myself!!! Until then, Many Blessings on you! Jasmin Horst
Reviewed by chris stienstra (Reader)
Reviewed on September 2, 2007
Strong and powerful Regis, but, the love and longing give it this power. I appreciate most of all your heart which is is able to show these emotions so clearly and wonderfully. A beautiful write.
With all of my best,
Chris
You have clearly allowed your feelings to be known - By thinking it alone would carry through it's intention - {true loved ones would never want so-much suffering-To honor that we must stay passionately spiritual } So I say a Beautiful love - - -Ted Bossis
I think everyone at some time or another has felt this exact way. You have seemed to capture the moments so vividly and displayed them so fluently.
Thanks so much for the read.
~Crissy~
Reviewed by Butch Howard (Reader)
Reviewed on November 14, 2006
I know so well the feelings which you have beautifully conveyed here in Haiku form. The emptiness grows deeper and darker until the moment the absence is ended. The "constant throbbing ache" is real and can olny be cured by the one who is so desperately missed.
-Outstanding Haiku!
~Butch
Lost love remains in the recesses of the heart. The emptyness, lonelyness can be overpowering. We weep for what once was, we yearn for that which is lost. Yet, if we can remember the special moments and feelings sublime , all is not lost. Time is the healer of broken hearts. I can feel you pain. I know it well, love can come again and perhaps it has or will for you.....M
The words make such an impact that the flow seems unimportant! As great as the flow is! Such a moving piece with a lot of sensitive emotions and sincerity. You portrayed the feeling of losing someone you love so well, Regis. One can clearly feel the pang of pain and emptiness in your words. A beautiful moving write!
Each haiku could stand alone and yet you have strung them together to create one symbiotic whole and what a beautiful whole it is. It is said that we are born incomplete and that we need another (that missing piece) to make us whole. I always think about what a little boy said once in descriping a pipe (tube). He said that it was 'two holes attached together'. I loved this and pondered upon something that it brought to mind. I don't believe that soul mates are missing pieces that need to find one another (your other half) to be completed. I believe that we need to find wholeness in and of ourselves and when we do, we can offer the other a whole person. In this way there is no neediness, no control and love is the only bond. I will leave you with one word... WOW! (Whole Other Whole?)
I love the idea of being two 'wholes' attached together.
Love always... Chanti
PS:
I didn't mean to undermine this love. It is clearly meaningful and deep for you and it will forever be a part of your heart. May your memories become sweeter in the passing of time.
Oh, Oh God, Regis Auffray, this hurt!
It ... I, well, so know this pain and you've expressed it in an exceptionally beautiful way...
You, I am so grateful to be reading you...how many, many Thanks I owe you...
and for This, also, for exprssing a lingering sadness that gave me knowing shivers...Oh, I hope for you to, well...beauty within the pain here and your heart and soul...
I can see why this won, many Congratulations and many Thanks for making another feel so not alone...likely, Sir, many others...
Bless You!
peace, yes, love, yes!
gratefullly
m.
Oh my God! This is exactly how I feel about the loss of "M" in my life. So well written and deeply felt. I feel the same pain, loss of breath, and emptiness.
I truly enjoyed this poem because I could identify so closely with the sentiment contained therein. So often there are those people in our world who must go away (either permanently or temporarily) and you have captured in a very true sense the emotions we experience when they leave.
Family, friend, even a foe - all can be missed for different reasons.
Great write - congratulations on your win!
A new fan,
~Rose~
Reviewed by Ruth Marlene Friesen (Reader)
Reviewed on February 25, 2004
Wow, every sentence finds a new way to describe that longing for someone not present right now.
I'm not trained in poetry, and often don't understand the more mysterious poems, but this one I do. I'm glad you won an award with it.
The haiku metre is ideally appropriate for this theme,that of loss and yearning. The words and images are very apt and generate a tone compatible with feelings that motivated your muse. It also is easy to read and relate to (who hasn't at some time lost and yearned?) and in that sense has the quality of universality -a quality which, in my opinion, is one of the hallmarks of a good poem. Well done, Regis.
I thought of my God. I thought of my father who has passed away. I thought of my first love from fifth grade. I thought of many friends who have taken many paths. And I even thought of me. Now that's a poem!!!
Congrats on an excellent poem. I love the one word use for the 5 syllables, very clever. Again congrats on your win, you deserve it Regis.
JC xoxoxo
Reviewed by Andrea Dietrich (Reader)
Reviewed on January 28, 2004
Congratulations on a great read. Andrea (a newbie)
Reviewed by William J. Cryer (Reader)
Reviewed on January 28, 2004
Ohh, I missed this one. Truly remarkable talent, Regis. Congratulations on your second go-round, and I wish you many more!!
Reviewed by Katy Walsvik (Reader)
Reviewed on January 28, 2004
OH, Regis.. This positively soars... it has a sense of wonder and a mystical quality. Your rhythm is flawless, but it's the sentiments and the bearing of your heart that wraps around the reader. To have something of such quiet beauty written for one is the ultimate expression of friendship and love. I'm always touched when poet can take a familiar feeling and just completely own it. You are a true original. (The tears began at the 2nd verse... my personal favorite.) I love this, Regis! katy xox.
I like this one so much that I am desireous of sending it to a friend of mine that I see very little anymore...in fact let him read it, I will...maybe he will understand what you write, LOL! Mine he says he cannot fathom...So perfect this one is, hope that friend of yours realizes the strength of your friendship...Peace, Ed & Rufuz
Regis -- Such response speaks of standing ovations, my friend!
The title, and the 11th stanza are grippers for me.
I so much appreciate your recent email. With certainty, the extension
is returned to you in kind. Vicky
Reviewed by Simon Thurlow (Reader)
Reviewed on January 19, 2004
Such a beautiful written tale of loss
Reviewed by La Belle Rouge (Reader)
Reviewed on January 19, 2004
This is so beautiful, so real, touched my heart deeply. Everyone should be loved and missed this way!
I'm certain that the person you wrote this for also "loses a heartbeat" when your name is mentioned. Wonderful work . . . to be successful, a poem has to make the reader "feel" something, and this one does.
Reviewed by *********** ********** (Reader)
Reviewed on January 19, 2004
I swear we are thinking the same thoughts.........this is beautiful and uplifting Regis....I agree, you would be the best sort of friend......ty for this....Dani
Reviewed by Jaclynn Huntington (Reader)
Reviewed on January 18, 2004
You have really outdone yourself with this one, Regis. Not only the flow but to do so in this form so seemingly effortless. The depth of feeling within the words are most moving. Well done, my friend.
Once again, you seem to have spoken for me. This was done beautifully.
Thanks for the review of Dancer On A Pole.... I like to shock people, as you noticed.
Technically, not haiku, but more tanka or whatever those other Japanese forms are. Nice job on them, although I still wish you could have a more upbeat experience now and then. :) I have outlived over 30 people that I cared about, and I know what a blow losing even one can be. I also know that I can't change things or turn back time. L'allegresse vient de dedans et pas de l'exterieure. I don't allow myself to grieve over things I can't change.
Wonderful write Regis....so full of depth and emotion.
Allen
Reviewed by Anna Marie Fritz (Reader)
Reviewed on January 17, 2004
"...It's hard not to fall in the void you left behind..."
Regis, this is exquisite...and hits so close to home. You
have no idea, my poet peer. This is one of your best...to
be sure.
"Absentia" delivers its messages in the cadence of the song of love.
Magnificence, inspiration, and beauty meet through every stanza of "Absentia".
I Salute You, Poet!
Andre Emmanuel Bendavi ben-YEHU
Reviewed by Jane Rodway (Reader)
Reviewed on January 17, 2004
This is so beautiful, what warm thoughts. I also love the photo. There is a painting that I like that reminds me of this photo, and it is funny how the lack of certain people really make you realize how alone you are. Excellent.
A very good write. Very deep insight to what friendhsip can be. The poetry itself read beautifully with a comfortable flow. I really enjoyed stopping by today!
Sherry
Reviewed by Marco Landi (Reader)
Reviewed on January 17, 2004
The absence of you
Is a constant throbbing ache
Deep within my soul....
very powerful though Thanks for the lesson..Marco
Curious you did it in this format. When I first read it, I felt strage about it, as if I was struggling against something. Then I realized what it was -- the format worked to benefit the piece. I read it a few times and then it became clear that because the format does not allow for embellishment, it seems to make the absence more acute. What I was feeling was the narrators struggle. That's what it was. Good work, Regis.
In a near-future Baltimore, an unemployed bipolar journalist and a teenage hacker are the last hope for a dystopian world controlled by a giant media corporation.
It is clever to write a poem where each stanza is in haiku format. Also must be a hard thing to master. For you might have been easy to do. But we'll never know. Not unless you tell us. :-)
I must admit that when I read each stanza I don't always feel a smooth flow from one stanza to the next in terms of creating one unified poem. Sometimes it feels like some stanzas are on their own as stand alone poems. Still, the entire piece is enjoyable and in parts moving. Emotion is present throughout as well. Thanks for sharing.
In the void you left behind
When you had to leave
I particularly like these few lines...
Someone once tried to tell me that Haiku was not real poetry - I beg to differ and you have proven it.
Yes- you stand beside me along this sea of emotions which covers most of all there is.
John
and I love your honesty! Written with such excellence!
Thank you for sharing, this must have been the right timing to
stop by to read this poem! Thanks for sharing and caring Regis!
Much Love,
Always!!
and so much meaning through it
well done.
Acirč
Where on earth did you learn to put such meaning into words? I love this one. Very, very good!!
Nicole
"I can barely breathe
When your picture comes upon
The screen of my mind
Unavoidably
When someone mentions your name
I lose a heartbeat"
this is a perfect message in a bottle! Hope she returned to you...
In Spirit,
Bear
These are beautiful, and any friend/lover would be proud to be their target. The third one is the one I relate most to. I know that feeling of anticipation. Time stands still while you wait to see if the words following the name will be negative or positive. Then...can you mask your feelings over the outcome, should you need to.... Very meaningful poems. Hugs,
Sheila
John
Albeit a new one
Very good.
Tony
Laura
Best wishes, my kindred soul. -=ra=-
With all of my best,
Chris
Thanks so much for the read.
~Crissy~
-Outstanding Haiku!
~Butch
God bless,
Sandie.
Each haiku could stand alone and yet you have strung them together to create one symbiotic whole and what a beautiful whole it is. It is said that we are born incomplete and that we need another (that missing piece) to make us whole. I always think about what a little boy said once in descriping a pipe (tube). He said that it was 'two holes attached together'. I loved this and pondered upon something that it brought to mind. I don't believe that soul mates are missing pieces that need to find one another (your other half) to be completed. I believe that we need to find wholeness in and of ourselves and when we do, we can offer the other a whole person. In this way there is no neediness, no control and love is the only bond. I will leave you with one word... WOW! (Whole Other Whole?)
I love the idea of being two 'wholes' attached together.
Love always... Chanti
PS:
I didn't mean to undermine this love. It is clearly meaningful and deep for you and it will forever be a part of your heart. May your memories become sweeter in the passing of time.
Wonderful emotion and evocative use of words stir the heart !!
Peter Paton
It ... I, well, so know this pain and you've expressed it in an exceptionally beautiful way...
You, I am so grateful to be reading you...how many, many Thanks I owe you...
and for This, also, for exprssing a lingering sadness that gave me knowing shivers...Oh, I hope for you to, well...beauty within the pain here and your heart and soul...
I can see why this won, many Congratulations and many Thanks for making another feel so not alone...likely, Sir, many others...
Bless You!
peace, yes, love, yes!
gratefullly
m.
As we wait for our heart's desires, my friend.
Family, friend, even a foe - all can be missed for different reasons.
Great write - congratulations on your win!
A new fan,
~Rose~
I'm not trained in poetry, and often don't understand the more mysterious poems, but this one I do. I'm glad you won an award with it.
~*~*~*~ Love, Shivani ~*~*~*~
Thanks for sharing your talent.
God Bless You and Your Loved Ones
Officer William Heffner
Now in the darkness
It is easy to fathom
The light that you shined
You realy have some great works.
Blessings,
Judith
SueB
JC xoxoxo
Thanks for reminding me of one of those people in my life from 9 years ago.
cynth'ya lewis reed
Thanks for your mail Regis
Your writing is superb
The title, and the 11th stanza are grippers for me.
I so much appreciate your recent email. With certainty, the extension
is returned to you in kind. Vicky
(((((hugs)))))
♫ Jackie
Sincerely
Antoinette
Vesna
Thanks for the review of Dancer On A Pole.... I like to shock people, as you noticed.
TRASK Excellently Done!
TRASK
Allen
Regis, this is exquisite...and hits so close to home. You
have no idea, my poet peer. This is one of your best...to
be sure.
Regis, This is so beautiful...
Lucky lady she is... :)
Trixie :)
Your emotions are felt
through your words.
This has a quite an impact on
the reader...wonderful work!
Hugs,
Maria
this is absolutely some of the most beautiful haiku i've read in a long time--each stanza connects with the next and tells a complete story
BRAVO, dear friend *applause*
(((HUGS))) and love,
karla. :)
"It's hard not to fall
In the void you left behind
When you had to leave
There is not a time
When I do not think of you
Know this is the truth
My friend I miss you
There is emptiness within
Each passing moment"
I applaud you, and your glistening pen!
Love, Sheila
This one is so great! A true friendship poem indeed! and it is so uplifting and inspiring too. Thank you for sharing such a wonderful poem!
Sandie Angel a.k.a. May Lu :o)
Magnificence, inspiration, and beauty meet through every stanza of "Absentia".
I Salute You, Poet!
Andre Emmanuel Bendavi ben-YEHU
"There is not a time
When I do not think of you
Know this is the truth
My friend I miss you
There is emptiness within
Each passing moment
The absence of you
Is a constant throbbing ache
Deep within my soul"
Touched by it!!
Love Tinka
Sherry
Is a constant throbbing ache
Deep within my soul....
very powerful though Thanks for the lesson..Marco
Carmen
Andrea
Debashish