AuthorsDen.com   Join | Login    
Where Authors and Readers come together!

SIGNED BOOKS    AUTHORS    BOOKS    SAMPLE CHAPTERS    AUDIOBOOKS    eBOOKS    STORIES    ARTICLES    POETRY    BLOGS    NEWS    VIDEOS    SUCCESS    TESTIMONIALS

Featured Authors:  Gibbs Williams, iMichael Charles Messineo, iLinda Frank, iLisa DAnnolfo Levey, iEdward Patterson, iLaura Cavanaugh, iWilliam Manchee, iTrennis Killian, iPamela Ackerson, iPamela Wiedenbeck, i

  Home > Humor > Poetry        Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry        Authors: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z     

Ed Matlack

 Follow Me  

· Contact Me
· Poetry
· Stories
· Blog
· Messages
· 6,048 Titles
· 45,923 Reviews
· Save to My Library
· Share with Friends!
·
Member Since: Aug, 2003

Ed Matlack, click here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.



A Very Merry SEWERy Christmas...
by Ed Matlack → (All Poetry by Ed Matlack)
   Rated "G" by the Author.
Share   Print  Save   Follow   Share on Facebook

What else can one do but laugh...or try


Poem Artwork


 


My sewer is over-flowing,


It does keep my grass a’growing,


The smell is enough to knock one out,


Perhaps its God for my Anti-Xmas attitude,


On me his unhappiness bestowing…


 


The sewer in this place has been a problem constant,


I have tried to avoid going into an overblown rant,


Maybe I should just stay in and smoke my plant,


I have tried to calm myself with a strong Zen chant…


 


Bet my dinner will smell great tonight,


With the complex I have tried to be quite polite,


But to have this sh** in my yard on Christmas day,


It is certainly not of any thing like a Christmas smelling bouquet…J


© ed J 12/25/06


Want to review or comment on this poem?


Need a FREE Reader Membership?


 Reviews of "A Very Merry SEWERy Christmas..."
Reviewed by Daniel McTaggart
Reviewed on December 31, 2006
I only used your toilet once, Ed. Don't blame it on me. I had a bran muffin that morning!

Reviewed by J.L. Day
Reviewed on December 26, 2006
Have yourself a very crappy Christmas, smell the dank bouquet... Nah, I'll leave it alone, but you could pen a nice song out of this one! lol

Hope your week gets better, amigo!

Reviewed by Susan de Vegter
Reviewed on December 25, 2006
This is one sure fire way of ruining one's appetite. I think I'd bid the host of the park to treat all to dinner elsewhere.
Merry Christmas!
Love,
Susan

Reviewed on December 25, 2006
feel for you buddy, hey take a ride in your house on wheels, far from the smelly mess might do u some good

Reviewed by Joyce Bowling
Reviewed on December 25, 2006
I second Sherry's motion...Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!! I hate this, happened to us one Thanksgiving and then our water meter tore up and we didn't have water, well you know how that goes, no water no bathroom either...then if that wasn't enough...I got the stomach virus! So, I've told you all of this to say...it could be worse...hope history doesn't repeat itself for me or you either. Enjoyed the write, hope they get there soon to fix the problem....makes me think of the t-shirts from the 70's...sh--- happens...
Blessings and Merry Christmas,
Joyce Bowling

Reviewed by SHERRY HEIM
Reviewed on December 25, 2006
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww....sorry, Ed. Life and sewer clogs go on, Christmas or not. I hope someone will be out soon to get it taken care of. It isn't easy to eat with the aroma from the sewer filling the air.
Take care,
Sherry

Reviewed by Tinka Boukes
Reviewed on December 25, 2006
Yuk...best of luck Edity!!

Too much shit in life can make any sewer overflow...even the minds!!

Love Tinky :)

Reviewed by Richard Cederberg
Reviewed on December 25, 2006
Oh Gosh Ed! The stench is horrid I know.

You know ... perhaps Santa finally slid down into the tank and rotted. Look for any signs of red clothes. If you find any, the reindeer can probably apply for welfare.

Stand Strong man! This too shall pass.
Richard Lloyd Cederberg


New Poetry by Ed Matlack
Popular Poetry (Humor)
  1.  Little Folk, Cousins Make A Pit Stop
  2.  If I Could Be A Super Hero
  3.  Fried Chicken
  4.  An Adventurous Reinterpretation of Mid
  5.  Like Ducks in Paper Trousers
  6.  Laughing As I Flee...
  7.  A Salt and Batter
  8.  Amazing Grapes
  9.  Newfangled Things
  10.  Milkman's letter
  11.  A Writer Named Ron
  12.  Ode to Spamophobia
  13.  The Last Second
  14.  Porky Pig And Daffy Duck
  15.  My First Heart Attack
  16.  Houston Greats
  17.  Atlanta Belle
  18.  Burst Forth
  19.  Flocking
  20.  Bad Boy
Free Book Review Program
Select a book to read and review today!

A Relief of Doodie: Shtty Stories to Read on the Pot by Jay Horne

Stories Worth Wiping Your A** With Whether you're making a deposit at the stank bank, dropping a return at the squat shop, or conducting a brown business meeting, these perfectly timed tales provide the literary fragrance your privacy deserves. F  
Member BookAds

Homer's Ill Iliad and Odd Sea Odyssey by Jay Dubya

Homer's Ill Iliad & Odd Sea Odyssey (420 pages) is an adult satire/parody rewrite of the classic stories of the 10 year Trojan War and of the 10 year adventure of Odysseus trying to return home to his native Ithaca.  
Member BookAds

52nd Book: Jay Dubya by Jay Dubya

Hawthorne: Hacked, Shakespeare: Sacked & Thurber: Thwacked is adult satire featuring adult language and content.  
Member BookAds