The Polar Bear Queen Contest is Upcoming… (poem) by Ed Matlack on AuthorsDen

The Polar Bear Queen Contest is Upcoming…
by Ed Matlack → (All Poetry by Ed Matlack)
Rated "G" by the Author.

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...Hey keep this little write between you and I, don't spread it around, as you will understand why, after you read it, oh and thanks in advance...

I think Pee Wee Ed will win if he competes, He does like cold water plunges, thinks they’re neat, And in February the ocean is quite cold, jumping in, a feat, Keep reading for why I think he will win, even without deceit… You see, and ya gotta keep this between us, Heaven forbid that PWE picks up on this, At the very least I will lose my Christmas present, At the most I will lose my balls, The second brother with the same malady… Well, how the story goes is this, Seems ole Ed got a bit loaded one night, now he’s my sis, Oh geez I didn’t want to let the cat out of the sack, Oh damn I did it again, sack is no longer a word we us near him, Well, suffice it to say, he jumped in a too cold lake and lost his… You know what I am talking about, Anyway it seems they were not lost, just traveling, Right to the chest cavity where they took up residence, Oh god, he will kill me if he lives through the embarrassment, Yes, ladies, Mr. Ed, pee wee (and now you know why he got that name), He just woke up one morning and there they were, Two of the nicest boobs you have ever seen on what was once a man… -gotta go- © 12/6/07

Reviewed by Ron (sketchman) Axelson (Reader)

Reviewed on December 12, 2007

Sure they are not goose bumps?

Reviewed by Ronald Hull

Reviewed on December 6, 2007

You're always ready with a good laugh.

Ron

Reviewed by Tinka Boukes

Shame on you for letting the cat out of that dogish bag!!

Love sTinky

Reviewed by Walt Hardester

Funny, man.

Walt

Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner

Always getting into trouble, aren't you, Ed, causing division among the ranks...LOL You're a mess. LOL

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.

Did you get a lot of coal as a child? Just wondering --

Reviewed by Christine Alwin

yikes, I think you might be in some hot water,,??? you definitely still have your you know what,,,,,LOL

Reviewed by Mr. Ed

At the very least I will lose my Christmas present,
At the most I will lose my balls,

And I think you are right on both counts, Brother, and I plan on winning that contest yet again.

PS And I really got you a very expensive Christmas present this year. Good thing I read this before I mailed it out. I think I'll give it to Edvard instead.

Signed Pee Wee,
The Polar Bear Queen

(You better start sleepin with one eye open!)

Reviewed by Georg Mateos

Oh may may!!! here's coming another one between my lil' brothers, Jersey!!! wise up, its Christmas for heavens sake, and its winter, and in winter the bear hibernates (read sleeps throughout) and if yo wake him up you will lose more than your ding-a-lings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ed the Elder