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Tom E Leftwich

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Triple “XXX” Sweats
by Tom E Leftwich → (All Poetry by Tom E Leftwich)
Thursday, November 18, 2021    Rated "G" by the Author.
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No offence intended, just another Wally World adventure.


Triple “XXX” Sweats

It was barely past the fourth, Black Friday without fail,
Lordy I couldn’t believe it, they had my sweats on sale,

Man o man triple extra large, they’ll fit just like a “T”,
Gigantic legs and big fat arms, how lucky can you be,

I just had to buy a cart full, ,eight came in a set,
All them different colors the best you’ll ever get,

Man I got some dirty looks from others wantin a pair,
Yeah, there was some discontent but I was the first one there,

Huge angry riders in little carts, the one’s with the battery pack ,
A little upset the rack was empty, I done cleaned out the stack,

I took some heat at the check out, that computer stuff just gets me,
I punched in eight as the number but they only charged for three,

I called a worker over and told him of my distress,
He said I really cain’t help you , this new math is a mess,

Now me, I’m an honest feller, most of the time at least,
But here I was a disturbance , they called for the police,

I raised my hands and told that sergeant you won’t believe my word,
But Sarge they wouldn’t take my money, a miracle has occurred,

I made this purchase honestly and with winter gittin near,
Now all my horses will be wearing sweats when Christmas day gets here,

,


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 Reviews of "Triple “XXX” Sweats"
Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on November 20, 2021
And I thought I was getting a good porn joke! ;-)

It is ironic that those stuff face diabetic idiots now have free scooters so they can get around with less exercise? So here I write in my sweatsuit and complain?

When you hit me with that last horse whammy, I had to chuckle. I was wondering why a skinny guy like you would ever need those humongous sweats. Sure glad that eight horses are warmer for it, mathematical dispute or not.

One of your best!

Ron

Reviewed by Diana Legun
Reviewed on November 18, 2021
Well, I started getting pretty offended until the horses came in. :) ~~ djl

Reviewed by T. Wignesan
Reviewed on November 18, 2021
Another really tall tale, Tom. Since in your own reckoning you're "an honest feller, most of the time at least", I think you have a good chance some readers at least will believe ya. Their not taking your money and the sweats fitting horses for Xmas, sounds like a Dickens-ian or Disney-ian fairy fib. Come on, Tom, whom are ya kidding???


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