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Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner

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Tanka No. 1: S/l/i/c/e/d & D/i/c/e/d
by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner → (All Poetry by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner)
   Rated "G" by the Author.
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My first attempt at Japanese Tanka. :)

Image (c) 2007, Karla Dorman


Poem Artwork


the wind is a knife
carving the body into
a frozen sculpture -
taking any enjoyment
out of the winter season

(c) 2008, Karla Dorman

 

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 Reviews of "Tanka No. 1: S/l/i/c/e/d & D/i/c/e/d"
Reviewed by Robert Wilson (Reader)
Reviewed on February 20, 2008
Like this! :)

Reviewed on January 22, 2008
Okay, how did I get to the ripe old age I will not mention I am and not know Tanka? Thank you for the intro Karla, and although I don't know it to say if you did Tanka well, you did well in this poem. I felt the cold slicing into arthritic pains which would so much rather be left alone. I will be learning and practicing Tanka myself I am sure.

May this find you well and happy,
Kathy

Reviewed by Charlie
Reviewed on January 21, 2008
Oh bravo! You did it! I love tankas-- they just read truer-- you know, kind of how our thoughts tumble around in chunks, while ku's are somehow (for me anyhow) too boiled down...? This is a good one. I'm so proud! --Charlie

Reviewed by Sheila Roy
Reviewed on January 21, 2008
Well done, Karla! An excellent metaphor in the beginning of this piece. Love the imagery and the conclusion. Bravo~
Sheila

Reviewed by Rafika Anderson (Reader)
Reviewed on January 21, 2008
Stark, cold, intense. I can FEEL the wind. Great writing, Karla.

Reviewed on January 21, 2008
IDON'TKnowwhatTankaIs
MustLookintoit!
Ilovethissweetquaintstarkingcoldpoemtho'
Warmed in the Spirit, Warrior Purple Lady Sweet Sheooxoo

STay Positive!

Reviewed by Amber Moonstone
Reviewed on January 21, 2008
I like this Karla, great Tanka.
Peace, love, and light,
Amber "V"

Reviewed by Georg Mateos
Reviewed on January 21, 2008
Yuuryou tanka waga tomodachi!!!
Arigatougozaimasu.
Georg

(Excellent Tanka, my friend, thank you very much)

Reviewed on January 20, 2008
I'm still at Haiku Karla, so forgive me for not being up to par on Tanka, of course your cool little Tanka is exactly what the wind did to my wife a I a feww minutes ago, it's cold as all outdoors around here in Bmore. we headed for home, quick

Reviewed by Rose Rideout
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
Your first attempt and a wonderful one at that Karla, Thank you for sharing.

Newfie hugs are on the way, Rose

Reviewed by Felix Perry
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
Exceelant choice of style as the Tanka blends in perfectly with the sudden harshness of bitter winter winds, snow storms and power outages.

fee

Reviewed on January 20, 2008
My Dad has writeen in this format, I have yet to master it though
God Bless
Michelle~

Reviewed by John Leko
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
...creative forces of nature...your penned knife...
makes a point.
John

Reviewed by Susan de Vegter
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
perfect harmony with ya'lls weather.
love and blessings,
Susan

Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
Describes the feeling...

Ron

Reviewed by Rebecca Lerwill
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
That's your first? Hope it's not your last! Yes - brrrrrr, all right, everyone!!
Come to Utah and we show you brrrrrrrrr....lol
Love and have a great Sunday, Karla!!!
Bec~

Reviewed by Dawn Anderson
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
If only that wind could just gently blow me someplace warm!

Reviewed by Joyce Bowling
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
Well done my friend, expressed well...great photo as well!
Blessings,
Joyce B.

Reviewed by Kate Burnside
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
I take it this isn't about indigestion or the morning after all the Hot Toddies the night before??!! :)) "Tanks, Kate"... "Don't mention it, Karla!" Feeling Sunday silly...(Johnny Depp always cranks me up!) but I can certainly relate to being hung, drawn and quartered by that North Wind. Think he plays xylophone on me bones... :)) K xx

Reviewed by Vesna Perkovic (Reader)
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
YOU are a marvel with words..wow!!
Brrrrrrr....

vesna

Reviewed by E T Waldron
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
Excellent Karla you gave me a chill just reading it!;-)

Love,
ET

Reviewed by Carole Mathys
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
Chilly visuals in this winter offering, Karla...
love, Carole~

Reviewed on January 20, 2008
Karla~

BRRRR!!! You put the chill in chill factor! LOL This one "cut" deep. Very well penned; brava!

(((HUGS))) and much love, your twink, Karen Lynn. ;D *shivering* BRRRR!!!!

Reviewed by ~ Holly Harbridge (Reader)
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
Karla, my dear, you did a splendid job, love holly

Reviewed by Ed Matlack
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
You got it, as it is windy here today with the lowest temps of the winter season so far...though Rufuz is out on his leash, he loves the cold...Ed & Rufuz

Reviewed by Karen Vanderlaan
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
i don't know about tankas but a good description of wind

Reviewed by Jerry Bolton (Reader)
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
Winter ain't supposed to be balmy . . . LOL . . . gotta love it . . .

Reviewed by Christine Alwin
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
gosh,,,, 14 below,, I am frozen in my tracks, Hope the wind will carve me into a mermaid.

Karla,, This is an awesome Write !!!!!

Love, Christine

Reviewed by Ted Bossis
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
Utensils of nature_(warmly)~Ted

Reviewed by Mr. Ed
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
No matter what you call this, it's very good. And as I soon head off with my mutts into -4 Degrees, with a Wind Chill of about -15,
I shall remember it well!

Reviewed by Bonnie May
Reviewed on January 20, 2008
Boy, what a time to write this. I'm freezing. Great job, well penned. Love, Bonnie


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