if i didn' have bad luck
i woul' have no luck a-tall
read da mornin' horoscope
said, "lady luck's gonna call"

i goes on my mornin' stroll
a black cat crosses my pat'
don't worry me--i'm lucky!
(i don' said dat t' da cat)

i go t' git in my car
wouldn' y'all know--tire's flat
fix dat up, git on my way
engine, she fall out--ka-splat!

call my frien', he help me out
he give me a ride t' work
da boss say dat's no excuse
so he fires me (dat jerk)

call my frien', he pick me up
since my car is gittin fix
decide t' git some breakfas'
bill comes t' six sixty six (o, no!!!!)

i git home...my wife's done lef'
she don' wan' be my honey
what she t'ink...dat i is rich
'cuz she can spen' dat money

wife, she shoppin' alla time
an' guess who stuck wit' da bills
i tried t' put my foots down
(she glare at me, fit t' kill)

git da mail--dere's ten mo' bills
da mortgage waaaaaaaaaaaay overdue
den dere goes da eel-ectric
an' dey shuts my water, too

now ain' dis a big ole mess
i goes on da po'ch t' t'ink
bol' a' lightning strike me down
(phew burnin hair sure do stink)

whooo-hooooooo, i am happy now
'cuz it look like i'm lucky
i done been hit by lightnin'
gonna win dat lottery!!!! :)
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i've been indirectly hit...twice...
when's it my turn to win the lottery?