Why can't I write of rainbows
and pretty butterflies
why can't I write of gardens
and clouds dancing in the sky
Why can't I write of lasting love
and passion's playfulness
Why do my words always speak
of depression's wretchedness
Depression, death, and suicide
hold my thoughts captive, enslaved
locked inside a troubled mind
reliving a rape, a torturous time
how often I wonder why I survive
Felo-de-se, my sweet suicide
When shall my heart be mine again
will I ever regain my soul
will hopelessness loose it’s grip on me
will depression let me go
I long to know true freedom
will liberty dare be mine
or shall my dreams of sovereignty
be lost to suicide
Why can’t I write of rainbows
and castles in the sky
why can’t I write of lovers
and hearts that never cry
why are my words imprisoned
by a darkness deep inside
how I long to be delivered
from my sweet suicide...
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Reviews of "Felo-de-se"
Reviewed by Katy Walsvik (Reader)
Reviewed on August 13, 2002
Your bio says you write as a form of therapy.. this poem took real courage to write and because its written so openly and so beautifully, I believe those rainbows are within your grasp... pain needs releasing just as rainbows do.. your poems reach out.. you have found many to hold on to.. sometimes you need to leave the path to find the real beauty.. let it go.love, katy.xx
VEry impressive. Deeply felt emotions and very well written.
Reviewed by Russ Okamura (Reader)
Reviewed on August 10, 2002
I love your passion prose created from your heart.
I look beyond the writing displayed as careful art.
I can grasp the elements of your creative style,
I see the soulful meaning surpassing my own mile.
This was truly profound, and I gained by your wisdom of pros.
Look past the rainbows into the sun and go forth...We all get rained on now and then, but we dry out eventually until the next storm comes along! Keep on keeping on my little sis!!
Caryn xoxo
Reviewed by Sanil nath (Reader)
Reviewed on August 8, 2002
Hello Lorrrrii .. ha ha ah :D .... Keep smiling and keep always happy ... wish u all happiness and love
HUGSSS >>..
Reviewed by Jim Smith (Reader)
Reviewed on August 8, 2002
I pesonally am glad you don't want to read any poetry about sunshine and butterflies. It'd be interesting to see speculate as to why people write only about HAPPY THOUGHTS.
Very painful Lori! I know the feeling well. However, we must be our own judge in life. We haven't done anything wrong, so we should live our lives and enjoy it to the fullest. Okay, I know it's easier said than done......but it's possible.
Lori,
I don't know what I can add, everything everyone has said is so true!!! You are an incredible woman, not to mention your talent is a force to be reckoned with!!!! I "hear" you loud and clear, and was asked by a few people when I first started writing, "why I did not write about flowers and things like that", but the shift will occur honey! Hold on!!!! You are a gift, that has many gifts to offer, that I promise you!!!!
Big Hugs,
Maria
xoxoxo
P.S. I know it makes my day,
when I post a poem, and I see you
have been to read it! It may seem
like that is only a little thing to you
but, look how much
it touches me!:o)
You just did write of those lovely things Lori, intermingled with the sad and bad,. But isn't that typical of life;-)I think you have strength to overcome all the darkness, and you will write your way into eternity...We need you;-)
(((HUGS))), hun...i hope things get better. you're in my thoughts and prayers...what a sad write, full of tears and emotions. TEN PLUS PLUS!!! for this...(((HUGS))) and love, karla. :(
This is wonderfully written.
I could feel my heart tugging at memories.
We all have the clouds,and the rain the rainbows do appear in time..Smile while they are there, and take them in, as they also fade away again. That is how we learn and grow. And become learn we have strength.
Thats the way I have lived me life.
Your writing is beautiful and event also of a beautiful heart and soul.
Perhaps the hardships and pain, you have in this life, is because you are also gifted with voice, in order to one day, reach out and take the hand of another who may not be as strong..And teach them, that they "can" go on..For now, see the hands reaching out to you..I see here there are many, and I am also one. **Hugs** Sweet Voice!
You will indeed be granted rainbows
*Hug*
~Jen
There's always light at the end of the tunnel. Be strong... don't let go of the gifts you have in your life, forget all the misfortunes! Think of all your blessings, your passions, and the bad will fade!
Reviewed by Drkman (Reader)
Reviewed on August 6, 2002
What a tremedous write. Every word spills forth the pain so many of us live with. I remember the thoughts of sweet death embrassing me. However suicide is truly a permenant solution to a temporary problem. Keep the faith and continue to wriote all all will work out
Drkman
Reviewed by Gumby Pokey (Reader)
Reviewed on August 6, 2002
you have to go through the mourning process first and then you can begin to heal.
this is a very moving write
and i wish you all the best
Reviewed by Dark Stranger (Reader)
Reviewed on August 6, 2002
you must look above the horizon
there is where the light dances
where the shapes of life are worn
lift your lovely chin and rest your eyes
tomorrow is the horizon
I enjoy your work ms lori
Reviewed by Dens Dreamweaver (Reader)
Reviewed on August 6, 2002
{{{{{{{ Lori }}}}}}}
Writing is one of the best therapies there is. And that you do well. Get it all out, and one day you'll emerge from your cocoon... and be that butterfly. I have complete faith in that.
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I look beyond the writing displayed as careful art.
I can grasp the elements of your creative style,
I see the soulful meaning surpassing my own mile.
This was truly profound, and I gained by your wisdom of pros.
Caryn xoxo
HUGSSS >>..
Your writing flies straight to the heart
whether or not it's about "rainbows"...
Peace to you dear soul. Beautiful write.
Tiffany
Sandie Angel :o) / May Lu $*_*$
I don't know what I can add, everything everyone has said is so true!!! You are an incredible woman, not to mention your talent is a force to be reckoned with!!!! I "hear" you loud and clear, and was asked by a few people when I first started writing, "why I did not write about flowers and things like that", but the shift will occur honey! Hold on!!!! You are a gift, that has many gifts to offer, that I promise you!!!!
Big Hugs,
Maria
xoxoxo
P.S. I know it makes my day,
when I post a poem, and I see you
have been to read it! It may seem
like that is only a little thing to you
but, look how much
it touches me!:o)
you know how i hate to be sentimental in my reviews, but hang in there darlin....stephen
In Silence___Whence I am Alone, I Find Myself, I Find Peace, In Pain I Found (God)...
hugs,
Chris
I could feel my heart tugging at memories.
We all have the clouds,and the rain the rainbows do appear in time..Smile while they are there, and take them in, as they also fade away again. That is how we learn and grow. And become learn we have strength.
Thats the way I have lived me life.
Your writing is beautiful and event also of a beautiful heart and soul.
Perhaps the hardships and pain, you have in this life, is because you are also gifted with voice, in order to one day, reach out and take the hand of another who may not be as strong..And teach them, that they "can" go on..For now, see the hands reaching out to you..I see here there are many, and I am also one. **Hugs** Sweet Voice!
You will indeed be granted rainbows
*Hug*
~Jen
Drkman
this is a very moving write
and i wish you all the best
there is where the light dances
where the shapes of life are worn
lift your lovely chin and rest your eyes
tomorrow is the horizon
I enjoy your work ms lori
Writing is one of the best therapies there is. And that you do well. Get it all out, and one day you'll emerge from your cocoon... and be that butterfly. I have complete faith in that.
Love
Melanie