Fun in the Gutter (poem) by Patrick A Granfors on AuthorsDen

Fun in the Gutter
by Patrick A Granfors → (All Poetry by Patrick A Granfors)
Rated "G" by the Author.

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Even while on vacation in the woods maintenance things have to be done. To the show tune "Up on the Roof" Photo:Mount Coolwater

This morning I climbed the ladder of doom A fine warm calm June day To clean the gutters of compost and things What’s there I cannot say Oh, on the roof the woods left big messes for free Hopefully they won’t have to medivac me No, No The shingles are slippery and the angle is steep This crap is just like glue The water pressure’s low and it splashes my face Now my hand’s stuck in this goo Oh, on the roof the woods left big messes for free Hopefully they won’t have to medivac me No, No Now the trowel is stuck and the nails have come loose The gutter is hanging low It’s near the peak of the roof and it’s so damned high I’m losing my grip now so Oh, on the roof the woods left big messes for free Hopefully they won’t have to medivac me No, No I should have hired Bubba this is gonna end bad The glide path’s very steep If I survive I’ll never do this again If I don’t I’ll be six feet deep Oh, on the roof the woods left big messes for free Hopefully they won’t have to medivac me No, No I just lucked out and landed right in the bush I’m done with leaves today I’m considering Bubba but his price is so high I’ll save this problem for another day Oh, on the roof the woods left big messes for free I'm glad they didn't have to medivac me No, No…Up on the roof…..Up on the roof… Up on the roof Copyright 2010 Patrick A Granfors

Reviewed by Ronald Hull

Reviewed on June 19, 2010

When young, thoughts turn to love; when old, to labor.

Glad you lucked out to write another day.

Ron

Reviewed by Georg Mateos

Reviewed on June 18, 2010

Every "do it yourself" own a ladder of doom, the smarter thing is to let Bubba to go up and break something...keeping you away from that six foot under!

Georg

Reviewed by Eileen Granfors

Reviewed on June 17, 2010

Should have slept in . . .the heat stroke is not a good thing.

Reviewed by Richard King

What the hell were you thinking? Bubba on the roof and you in the chaise lounge, beer in hand, just sounds so much more sensible to me. Old bones break real easy.

Dick.

Reviewed by Mr. Ed

The Ladder of Doom - the mind boggles here with the dangers of you, a ladder, and more insects. Be very careful, up there. And watch out for Roof Racoons and Rowdy Raptors, too.

Reviewed by Paul Berube

The pains of home ownership, Patrick. Nicely told.

Reviewed by Christine Tsen

Reviewed on June 16, 2010

That's an exquisite ballad Patrick. I'm getting into your poetry.
Namaste
Christine

Reviewed by Dayvid Graybill

Yeah, gutters aren't as fun as they used to be! More often than not tho, that's where my mind is.

Peace,
Dayvid

Reviewed by Ed Matlack

Oh stop whinin', as its your house you are the one that NEEDS to clean them gutters, not Bubba...save him for real emergencies like when the sewer clogs up...LOL, Ed

Reviewed by Peter Schlosser (Reader)

Maybe you should drink a beer and then go up to the roof and, well no, on second thought, don't do that! Don't touch the beer and go on that roof, you hear me!!!

Reviewed by Mark Lichterman

Ain't no fun on a roof, my friend. I've been there thousands of times and so well know that going up is so much eaiser than coming down, not too fast, though. Though still in the "going on roof business", I just do not do it anymore and neither should you... EVER!!!
Your friend, Mark

Reviewed by JASMIN HORST SEILER

You have your mind in the gutter and on the gutter, but you said it well without a stutter, ha good one Patrick! Jasmin Horst

Reviewed by Kate Burnside

This is one fine capture of the song and you the deft poetic songbird that sings it with such gay abandon! Can relate to this one big time, Patrick, as our house is sorrounded by stunning oaks and Scots pine - double trouble whatever time of year it is and constant hard work... they make us surely pay for their gratuitous beauties! xx

Reviewed by Deborah Tornillo

Patrick: With a home in the Shanandoah Mountains - we too have our gutter issues. As a matter of fact - we just hired someone to clean ours. Every Spring its the gutters and every Fall its the leaves. It's worth every penny to pay "Bubba." I enjoyed your sense of humor. Great poem.

Deborah

Reviewed by Sage Sweetwater

Summer version of Chevy Chase's Christmas Vacation! Put the safety lock on the staple gun! A ride in an air ambulance is $35,000 - great to have home owners insurance with a life dormer deductible...Fun in the Gutter is worth its premium, Patrick...

Love,
Sage