Cows rule!
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Do milk each opportunity for all its’ worth.
Don’t cry over spilled milk, appreciate your girth.
No fat, calories or cholesterol … no taste.
When angered, turn the udder cheek and mooooo-ve with haste.
Stepping in cow patties attracts flies from your eyes.
Since your bull went to pasture, you’re seeing other guys.

Do let ev’rybody know you are the bossy.
The other side IS greener, yours is too mossy.
Never take another cow’s calf or bull, that’s cruel.
It’s better to be seen, not herd. Wolves think it’s cool.
Whatever you believe, cow-nt your blessings each day.
No one will buy their milk if it’s given away.

Although I’m Dairy Mary, why not eat more pork?
Foreign cattle may be MAD so, do not import!
I’ve heard some give strawberry and chocolate too.
If I ate curds and whey, my farmer’d milk beef … stewed.
Honor fodder, mudder and udder relatives.
Don’t hop on a truck when teats have shrunk, milking ‘gives.’

You’re related to Heifers though none are named ‘Hugh.’
If I posed for “Playboy,” you’d get a double view.
Though I am black and white, it’s hard to get a read.
Love lounging in clover, grass; there’s not much I need.
Going ‘a-la-nude’ comes naturally to gals like me.
Come, kick up your hoofs, and play around joyfully.