Does the court actually operate this way

Mister Harris again

Hello mister Harris , surprised to see you here,
Weren’t you charged with something, seems it was last year,

Your honor I was the accused, said I robbed a Wal Mart store,
But I wasn’t stealing nothing , it was a hernia thing I wore,

Becky and I was at an accident and the cop there had us listed,
I didn’t wanna be here, but that lawyer there insisted,

Mister Harris that’s Counselor Pierce , he’s with the defendant in the chair,
Well your honor, you cain’t trust the Counselor. He wasn’t even there,

There was only that one pizza guy and him with the bandage on,
I stayed and talked to the pizza guy after the cops were gone,

Mister Harris please! As a witness , would you just tell what you saw,
The city is prosecuting , because that man broke the law,

Yes sir, me and Becky were just returning from that hair cut saloon,
Damn thing was closed , on a lunching break, had to be about noon,

We were standin on the corner of East and Pearl when the traffic light turned green,
Judge , your honor, that traffic light is the worst I’ve ever seen,

Sometimes I almost run to make it across and catch it red you see,
But every time I reach that corner, the damn thing knows it’s me,

It's off and green , that son of a B , I’ve always gotta wait,
Yes ! Counselor Pierce object sustained ! Go ahead and interrogate,

Mister Harris at the car’s impact , what did you actually see,
I think I squinted and ground my teeth, it was right in front of me,

You know I could see it coming and almost feel the crashing,
I guess I really closed my eyes at the final smashing,

Your honor he admits he didn’t see it, can we give his wife a call,
Well now she ain’t my wife you know , just live together’s all,

She has her ways and does her things the way she wants sometime,
Then , of course there’s times aplenty when I wanna do mine,

Becky is her English name she’s a native Norwegian sir,
And if you ask her questions, you’ll need an interpreter ,

Your honor I’d like a recess, we‘ll get computer language support,
No Counselor, that’s not possible, they’re not allowed in court,

Mister Harris, I see you’re nervous, is there a problem now.
Yes sir my Becky’s in the kennel, gotta get her here somehow!

Dum ta dum dum