You Won't Believe This...!

I have a bold bodyguard
For whom I've the highest regard
She is brave and strong
She wears only a thong
She's also an accomplished bard
 
A fellow by the name of Klink
Had one drink too many at the rink
When he tried to skate
He fell on his date
So she had him thrown in the clink
 
There's a fine employee named Leigh
She's always as busy as a bee
She will help you out
If you do not shout
She won't even charge you a fee
(You don't have to get on bended knee)
 
A fine lad from Britain named Bumpus
Sought to find his college campus
He tried but in vain
He got lost in the rain
Because he'd forgotten his compass
 
There once was a fellow from Fargo
Who wanted to live in Key Largo
He declared himself freight
He was put in a crate
And shipped to Key Largo as cargo
 
There once was a fellow named Matt
It was his turn at the bat
He swung at the ball
He missed and did fall
On top of the coach's pet cat
 
There once was a lady named Beth
Who had an experience with meth
She took more bit by bit
Could not live without it
And soon had an encounter with death
 
There once was an elderly gent
Whose idea of fashion was bent
He wore only a thong
That was so very wrong
It was suggested that he wear a tent
 
I once knew a girl named Brittany
She was head of a large company
She was shrewd and capable
Not rude nor gullible
And in love her skills were uncanny
 
There once was a gong banger named Wong
Who never did anything wrong
He strived to be good
As everyone should
While he continually banged on his gong

© Copyright 2010    Regis Auffray