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Just because I don't share past abuses 7/11/2005 11:27:14 AM
doesn't mean I didn't have them
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A reader said my comments on others poems of abuse and past hurts, was mean and uncaring. That my poetry was mostly about god or good and happy things, and just because I never had their problems I shouldn't act so uppity.
I wonder how some people think they can know someone because of a few lines in a comment, or even from reading my poetry etc. First of all you evidently haven't read me enough or you would know you are wrong to accuse me of being mean and uncaring.
I happen to believe in God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. I take my faith seriously, and I try to live it. I'm not always successful, but I never stop trying.
I believe when God said to give Him my burdens that's exactly what He meant.
I have had some horrific abuses during a 16 year marriage to a Jeckyll and Hyde psychopath. Because I learned to trust the Lord, and His word does not mean I have forgotten it. What it does mean is that I have chosen to give Him the burden of those terrible times and allow my psyche to heal so that I can go on with life in a more positive way having allowed the Lord to deal with it.
Because I don't choose to write about it only means that I know it is in the past and cannot hurt me unless I let it. I choose instead to be healed. Why would I write over an over again about something the Lord has, through grace and love, taken from me?
Why would I choose to live in the misery of those years when I can live in the beauty of the ones that Creator has blessed me with. I may have been a lot of things and done a lot of wrong at one time , but one thing I am not is a fool. I refuse to live with garbage when there's a dumpster available
So to those who think my comments or writing is mean spirited, because I don't wail and moan over what is past. Think again! I will not write about the horrors I went through just to please you.
For those who are seriously ill and can't get over there psychosis there is help available. I feel very sorry and sad for those who truly can't seem to get it together and let go of their garbage, but there are ways to do enough so that they can get by.
The problem is many don't want to do it. They need the scapegoat in order to live with themselves. Those who feel better about writing it out, by all means they should do it. However don't assume that others haven't suffered every bit as much if not more in their own lives, because they don't write about it.
For others and this is the smaller number of people who really are deeply mentally ill, it's not likely that you would be reading their poetry here at the den or other sites. They are usually in seclusion somewhere. God help them for they truly are the neediest, and I pray for those who do not have the capability to change. I also pray for those who mistakenly think they know me, and can denigrate my character. I pray your heart will be touched by the one who heals.
