As I confessed in a previous blog, I smoke. In fact, I smoke like the proverbial chimney at times. Now I say, “Big Deal,” since it seems that my addiction to nicotine isn’t nearly as bad as your addiction to cell phones, that is, if you’re one of those people who think you must constantly have a cell phone plastered to your ear in order to prove to the world that you either (A) have friends; (B) have family; (C) are important; (D) like to hear the sound of your own voice; or (E) are so downright rude and uncivil that you don’t care one iota that you are subjecting other people to your inane chatter. 

“Okay,” you say, “so what’s your point?” Well, my point is that, as I learned from Newsmax.com (April 2, 2008), whereas my addiction could possibly give me lung cancer, it now appears that your addiction to gabbing away on your cell phone can give you cancer of the brain. Yes, that’s right, you heard me, cancer of the brain, that lump of gray matter that takes up most of the space in your cranium. In fact, according to the article, “A top Australian neurosurgeon says cell phones may cause more cancer in the near future than smoking or asbestos” (¶ 1).

“Oh, my word,” you say. “Please tell me it isn’t true.”

Sorry, no can do since according to Dr. Vini Khurana (2008), who conducted an extensive study of the connection between cell phones and brain cancer, it seems that using cell phones for at least ten years can “more than double your risk of developing brain cancer” (¶ 1). Moreover, according to the article, “since three times as many people today use cell phones as smoke, cell phones will soon emerge as a major killer;” and as Dr. Khurana added, “It is anticipated that this danger has far broader public health ramifications than asbestos and smoking, and directly concerns all of us, particularly the younger generation, including very young children”  (¶ 2).

And you thought my addiction was unhealthy, perhaps even vile? Just wait a few years, and I think you may well be singing an entirely different tune. And how do I feel about the gravity of this health issue? Well, since I am someone who uses my cell phone maybe once or twice a month, at most, I say, take that all you anti-smoking cell-phone-dependent fanatics who treat us smokers like pariahs. Na, Na, Na, Na, Na.  And, no, I haven’t been drinking. I am just acting very immaturely, perhaps because it is now almost 2:00 in the morning and my brain is numb from grading student papers.

Cell Phones More Dangerous Than Asbestos. April 2, 2008. http://www.newsmax.com