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Spirit Drainers 3/12/2013 4:50:50 AM
In the past I spent way too much time trying to help people who were a drain on me spiritually-physically and emotionally. No matter how much they claimed they wanted to get better-all they wanted to do was to talk about how bitter they were-why others were the reason for their problems but they never wanted to move beyond them. For if they did it would mean a change from people always being worried about them and in such a depressing state, weird as it sounds that appeals to certain individuals. To be motivated and change is not something they like. Quite literally their problems have become their daily existence. I know of a married couple that once tried to help a young man who was always down on himself.From what he said to them-if he only had these things in his life he could get a grip on life and then get out of the pit he found himself in. This couple went so far as to get him a haircut, get his teeth fixed,-get him some new clothes and even arranged for a job interview.From his work experience the potential employer wanted to meet him. When it came time for the interview he refused to show up making excuses. immediately the couple saw they had been used. He didn't want to grow up.
The young couple got upset-became discouraged and even criticized the young man for all they had done for him and yet he enjoyed being in his woe is me attitude.
There comes a time in all of our lives where each of us has to say --enough is enough and realize some people never want to change.Some might say" Well are not even Christians supposed to help others out"-actually if you look in the New Testament or google it you will soon find these words
" if any will not work-neither let him eat"
Laziness is something nobody encourages or praises in others.You should never be upset when people you try to help refuse to follow any program to help them get better. We all need Boundaries in our lives-we all need to reach a point in our lives where we say" That's it--I can't do anymore" and move on to those who actually want to be helped.It is safer to allow ourselves the freedom to not be bothered worrying over people who care only about draining you any way they can. After you they will find somebody else. We have boundaries in traffic lights and the law which tell us-thus far you can go and no farther or else something drastic could happen--an accident or some silver bracelets and a room of less than agreeable members of society. We all have boundaries--even a man or a woman who chooses perhaps to say " I will have sex with whoever I choose to have sex with--even if they are married"--well personally that is like driving down a hill with no brakes--yes you are free to do what you want to do and yes you will reap the consequences.(Proverbs 6:32-35)
Regarding the young man in question that I mentioned earlier is naturally older now and if he hasn't changed is somewhere feeding off a new group of caregivers and that as I say often is not news BUT that too is Reality
