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Blogs by Sue Hess My tears are not unshed 1/5/2007 6:03:35 PMI'm sad tonight...tears welling behind my eyes while I try to fight the inevitable. I know its coming and there is so little I can do to avoid it...
Depression is a horrible thing, even when it is shades of gray rather than depths of black despair. Tears are meant to be shed and trying to hold them back creates a dam that is worse than the crying. Nothing has happened to cause this spiral, a normal day at work, nothing unusual with the family. My grandson is being initiated into his fraternity in Rolla. No cause for pain there, the hazing isn't even a dreaded thing these days. My granddaughter is at a movie with a friend. I loved movies when I was her age too. My brother let me tag along every Sunday afternoon to whatever horror movie happened to be showing and he put up with my interminable questions. Seems so long ago. Maybe that is part of the problem...the way time seems to be moving too quickly. Years used to be made up of twelve months, they now fly by in minutes. That doesn't seem right though, I've never been afraid of age, it comes with too many blessings. I look in the mirror and I try to mourn for that twenty five year old that used to look back at me, but she was such a dingy twit, it's hard to miss her. One of the tears is running down my cheek now, maybe a good crying jag and it will all be over. Tomorrow I'll wake up smiling, take my mom to the beauty parlor, have lunch and read a good book...how can a day like that be depressing. Maybe...we'll just have to see. Post a Comment More Blogs by Sue Hess • Me...again - Thursday, June 25, 2009 • Shootings in city hall - Friday, February 8, 2008 • Ho Ho....Hum? - Friday, February 8, 2008 • Happy 2008 - Wednesday, January 2, 2008 • Happy Thanksgiving - Thursday, November 22, 2007 • A favor??? - Monday, October 29, 2007 • Hats off to Idiocy - Friday, October 26, 2007 • Hello again - Wednesday, October 17, 2007 • Oral Fixations? - Wednesday, October 10, 2007 • And you know what else.... - Tuesday, October 2, 2007 • Moonlight - Friday, September 7, 2007 • Where have you been???? - Wednesday, August 29, 2007 • Somewhere.... - Thursday, August 16, 2007 • Will you still need me, will you still feed me - Wednesday, August 1, 2007 • What have you read lately? - Friday, July 20, 2007 • Ice Cream - Friday, July 13, 2007 • Wow am I hot... - Sunday, July 8, 2007 • Too relaxed??? - Friday, July 6, 2007 • Hi I'm back... - Monday, July 2, 2007 • What else can go wrong... - Tuesday, June 19, 2007 • Opening my heart to you - Sunday, June 17, 2007 • Ahhh Youth - Friday, June 15, 2007 • Reality Bites....Me - Thursday, June 14, 2007 • More nonsense from me - Thursday, June 14, 2007 • Tell me your secrets... - Wednesday, June 6, 2007 • The 'I' that is me - Monday, June 4, 2007 • Soliliquy on Sex - Saturday, June 2, 2007 • In your face writing - Friday, June 1, 2007 • Pirates of the Carribean - Friday, May 25, 2007 • Books??? - Friday, May 18, 2007 • Down with Promiscuity... - Friday, May 11, 2007 • Rod Stewart - Thursday, May 10, 2007 • Did ya miss me... - Wednesday, May 2, 2007 • College... - Thursday, April 19, 2007 • Sunday - Sunday, April 15, 2007 • I feel so silly - Monday, April 9, 2007 • Meet John - Saturday, April 7, 2007 • Creative License - Friday, March 30, 2007 • It's Hard for Me - Friday, March 23, 2007 • It is so wrong... - Thursday, March 22, 2007 • shhhh don't tell anyone - Wednesday, March 14, 2007 • Is it Bombe or Bombay? - Monday, March 12, 2007 • Thursday - Thursday, March 8, 2007 • False Impressions - Tuesday, March 6, 2007 • Saturday morning - Saturday, March 3, 2007 • Nope still not me - Thursday, March 1, 2007 • Is It Time to Update - Tuesday, February 27, 2007 • Okay, So What Are You Doing This Weekend - Friday, February 23, 2007 • Hi...Just Me Again - Thursday, February 22, 2007 • I miss the old Sue.... - Saturday, February 17, 2007 • Hypo what? - Thursday, February 15, 2007 • Snow, Snow Everywhere - Tuesday, February 13, 2007 • Saturday evening 2/10 - Saturday, February 10, 2007 • Who is the winner? - Wednesday, February 7, 2007 • Sunday Evening - Sunday, February 4, 2007 • Who Invented these damned birthdays anyway - Sunday, January 28, 2007 • Ross Perot, my new boss.... - Wednesday, January 24, 2007 • This damned ice - Sunday, January 14, 2007 • My tears are not unshed - Friday, January 5, 2007 • Happy New Year - Saturday, December 30, 2006 • it's over! - Tuesday, December 26, 2006 • I'm back - Thursday, December 14, 2006 • Ross Perot is on my mind..... - Sunday, December 10, 2006 • Charles - Monday, November 27, 2006 • Wednesday Nov. 22 - Wednesday, November 22, 2006 • Saturday - Saturday, August 26, 2006 • how pretentious - Friday, June 30, 2006 • Hi! - Thursday, June 22, 2006 • Weakness - Tuesday, March 21, 2006 • and so.... - Thursday, February 23, 2006 • Thursday - Thursday, January 5, 2006 • Thanksgiving...and yes I do! - Wednesday, November 23, 2005 • The Deb Saga - Monday, November 7, 2005 • Spoon River Hoax - Tuesday, October 11, 2005 • Hot Damn..Hot Dreams - Friday, September 23, 2005 • Until I Find You - Wednesday, September 14, 2005 • and then it was Thursday... - Thursday, August 25, 2005 • Disco anyone? - Wednesday, August 24, 2005 • Dying - Friday, August 19, 2005 • Physics?? - Sunday, August 14, 2005 • Alexandre,Sandie,Felix,Jerry, Ed... - Saturday, August 6, 2005 • Because we CAN... - Thursday, August 4, 2005 • I'm sitting alone at home..... - Wednesday, July 27, 2005 • Harry Potter - Thursday, July 21, 2005 • Willie Wonka - Monday, July 18, 2005 • a step back - Thursday, July 14, 2005 • Hello, hello - Monday, July 11, 2005 • Update - Wednesday, June 29, 2005 • Unhappy? - Monday, June 13, 2005 • Stormy Nights - Thursday, June 9, 2005 • Steve King - Wednesday, June 8, 2005 • ah so - Monday, June 6, 2005 • Good News - Thursday, May 26, 2005 • Friday Night Jitters - Friday, May 13, 2005 • Poetry London - Wednesday, April 27, 2005 • Struggling with Demons - Thursday, April 21, 2005 • D Day - Monday, April 18, 2005 • Make Mine a Vampire - Tuesday, April 12, 2005 • Sincere Apologies - Friday, April 8, 2005 • All I Know About Sex - Tuesday, April 5, 2005 • Great News on the Home Front - Sunday, April 3, 2005 • Me...bitching again... - Friday, April 1, 2005 • On Line Love Affairs - Monday, March 28, 2005 • Way to Go Sis - Friday, March 18, 2005 • Back from the dead - Thursday, March 17, 2005 • Achoo!! - Monday, March 7, 2005 • Deb - Friday, February 25, 2005 • The Prodigal Daughter - Friday, February 25, 2005 • T.g.i.f. - Friday, February 18, 2005 • Doubts - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 • re poetry and truth...again - Monday, February 14, 2005 • re Tuesday - Tuesday, February 8, 2005 • Friday lasts forever - Friday, February 4, 2005 • Who I am... - Wednesday, February 2, 2005 • Grandma - Tuesday, February 1, 2005 • Truth - Monday, January 31, 2005 • Blog?? - Friday, January 28, 2005 • Poetry Sells?? - Friday, January 28, 2005 • Crack - Tuesday, January 25, 2005
