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Blogs by Sue Hess
Sincere Apologies 4/8/2005 11:36:21 AM
No I have absolutely nothing to say but I'll do anything to push that last blog back some.
The idea of me giving sex advice is so ludicrous...it scares me. Of course, I haven't had a drink in 15 years and I can still make a killer martini so maybe it wasn't so dumb after all. Memory is a wonderful thing. And kiddies, let me tell you, I have a life to remember. Not all of it good, maybe not even much of it good, but God knows it was never boring. And the men were glorious, again, not all good but damn they were never boring. I always fell for the bad boys, the ones who you knew were going to hurt you but you also knew that until they did, you would have more fun than you could ever imagine. I think the reason I gave up dating isn't because I was tired or bored with it or anything like that. The problem is that I still want what I could get when I was 25. The hard butt and pecs...you don't get them alot after you pass fifty. No offense fellas I love you all, and I have to say that a man has to be older to have any sense at all but we are not talking about sense here...just sensation. And truth is, men are better as they get older and for that reason, most of them have been have been grabbed by 22 year olds with tight bunns. Damn, I hate it when life parodies itself this way. So now that I'm over fifty, men my age are babysitting most weekends so my choice is either the geriatric crowd and I'm not ready to change anyone's Depends, or I have to go the other way and be the older woman to some randy 20 year old. Yeah, I've had offers in that area but my grandson is 17, the ridiculousness of it is too much for my sense of humor. So ladies...what do we do? Stay home and watch Nine and a Half Weeks and dream of Mickey Rourke or dye our hair blue and go for bingo weekends? I look terrible in blue, although I am reserving the right to go with the bingo thing in the near future, and the trouble with watching Mickey Rourke in that fantastic movie is that he is making love to Kim Basinger which just makes my point all over again about what we can get at this age. I don't know, but it isn't really a major issue, just something to talk about to get that terrible sex advice blog down off the screen. I love you people who read these things...I would hate to think I'm the only one doing that.
