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Blogs by Marcus Dino
FIFI'S THOUGHTS 12/2/2008 8:11:17 AM
MARCUS IS REACHING A CERTAIN AGE. MARCUS IS REACHING A CERTAIN AGE. HAPPPYHAPPYPAPPY HAPPYHAPPYHAPPY Marcus today or maybe it's tommorrow you are reaching a certain age of 'wisdom.' An enlightened age. An age not much younger than my parents which I would look forward to say the same as an enema. An age where if an actress has not made she is put away into an actress's rest home. An age where a woman has some many wrinkles on her face she starts looking well like a road map. An age where you will get a nice wooden cane as a birthday present right? An age where my father told me I actually may grow up and turn into an adult. An age where the average person is sound safe and asleep at 11 PM on a Friday or Saturday night while their Gen Y age kid is acting the total fool. An age where you are officially given a senior citizen's/old person's discount card and can now attend things cheaper because you are now officially a senior citizen/old person. An age where a great majority of men are taking some kind of 'blue pill.' OMIGOSH POTTY MOUTH. An age where there seems to be as many grandparents as there are parents. Happy certain age Marcus. Of course it's really nice that even though you have lived on the good old Earth while it spun around good old Sol that certain number of years, you still look a bit younger.
ACTUALLY IN REFERENCE TO WOMAN WHO ARE 40 OR 45 OR 50 OR WHATEVER THERE ARE A LOT OF ATTRACTIVE WOMEN THAT AGE. I'VE SEEN SOME 40 YEAR OLD WOMEN WHO LOOK BETTER THAN A 25 YEAR OLD KID AROUND MY AGE WHO TAKES A LOT OF BOOZE AND DRUGS. IT'S JUST I HAVE THE SMOOTHEST SKIN THE SMOOTHEST SKIN..........
Speaking of a birthday joke I HAD A NIGHTMARE LAST NIGHT IN WHICH AN EVIL GENIE CAME OUT OF A BOTTLE AND TOLD ME HE PUT ME UNDER A SPELL AND GAVE ME TWO CHOICES. MY LIFE OR TURNING 50. WELL AFTER A WHILE HE GOT TIRED OF WAITING AND ASKED WHY I TOOK SO LONG.......I SAID I'M THINKING I'M THINKING........EEEEEEEEEK A TRIBUTE TO THE OLD YOUR MONEY OR YOUR LIFE JACK BENNY JOKE
So Marcus you're having an intimate party in downtown LA with some friends/acquaintances to tommorrow to celebrate that certain age. Great I'll be there.
Ay Marcus have ye been intimate with any woman before you've reach this certain age laddie? Do ye know the character Steve Carell plays and have ye both eaten dinner and played a coupled of games of cards with a couple of fine ladies and then retired early on a Saturday evening and that's been your most primary form of entertainment laddie?
You don't take a certain pill right now Marcus do you laddie. Nothing except say an aspirin?
OMIGOSH POTTY MOUTH POTTY MOUTH I'M GOING AGAINST MY PRINCIPALS. I MOST CERTAINLY DO BELIEVE AN UNMARRIED MAN OR WOMAN SHOULD RESPECT THEMSELVES TILL THEY GET MARRIED AND IF I'M STILL NOT MARRIED WHEN I REACH A CERTAIN AGE WELL I MAY HAVE TO MARRY A BIT YOUNGER THAN YOU MARCUS IF I WANT TO HAVE ANY KIDS. DIDN'T MEAN TO PRY INTO YOUR PRIVATE LIFE MARCUS AND I KNOW YOU KNEW A LOT OF WOMAN AND IF YOU WERE A 'NICE BOY' ALL THAT TIME GOOD FOR YOU.
SPEAKING OF 'THE ACT' OMIGOSH OMIGOSH A SPACE SHOW THAT I USED TO LOVE TO WATCH ON TV IS TALKING ABOUT SEX IN SPACE AND HOW SOME ASTRONAUTS WHO MAY HAVE ALREADY 'DONE IT' AND HOW SOME YUPPIES ARE WILLING TO SPEND OVER A HUNDRED THOUSAND BUCKS WHEN THOSE VIRGIN ATLANTIC FLIGHTS TAKE OF SO THEY CAN BE THE FIRST TO OFFICIALLY 'DO IT' UP THERE. FORTUNATELY NASA SAID WITH ZERO GRAVITY IT IS PHYSICALLY QUITE DIFFICULT BUT SOME 'SPACE ARCHITECT' SAID FUTURE SPACECRAFTS MAY HAVE A PRESSURIEZED SNUGGLE ROOM IN THE FUTURE. SHAME ON THESE DIRTY MINDED DEVIANTS THROWING A HUNDRED GRAND A PIECE TO DO THINGS LIKE THAT IN OUTER SPACE WHEN SO MANY PEOPLE ARE GOING JOBLESS AND HUNGRY OUT HERE ON EARTH. OF COURSE THE SHOW WAS SPONSERED BY THAT COMPANY THAT MAKES 'BLUE PILLS.'
YOU PEOPLE ENJOY YOUR 4 DAY THANKSGIVING HOLIDAY? WELL I WAS JUST SO HAPPY TO GET OUT OF LA AFTER BEGGING PETROS MY BOSS TO TAKE THESE 4 DAYS OFF AND TRY TO GET ANOTHER GIRL TO WORK FOR ME AND I WOULD WORK HER SHIFT. NOTHING DOING HAD TO WORK THANKSGIVING DAY AT TIME AND A HALF WHILE YOU PEOPLE WERE ALL MUNCHING YOUR TURKEY AND MASHED POTATOES.
But I was able to get Friday Saturday and Sunday off and ohhhhhhhh how much I loved getting from the crowded smoggy LA with my two alien friends Alocki and Biff. We went to a beautiful place on the central coast called Morro Bay. Omigosh there's this huge natural rock right on the beach called Morro Rock and Alocki and Biff being the highly 'left brained' aliens they were wanted to study the rock formation, wanted to study the flight patterns of those silly sea gulls, take a both all around the harbor.......I just enjoyed walking on the beach. Alcoki told me that Morro Bay is very similar to a natural harbor founded on her home planet of Zatoris. I need to visit that Zatoris one of these days and compare to our Earth.
I'M SORRY THE SIGN SAID WE COULDN'T CLIMB MORRO ROCK BUT WHY ARE ALL THOSE SILLY SEA GULLS ALLOWED TO CLIMB THAT ROCK. ISN'T THAT DISCRIMINATION AGAINST US HUMANS? WE ALSO LOOKED FOR CLAMS ON MORRO BAY BEACH. I TRULYTRULYTRULYTRULYTRULY WONDER HOW MANY CHAKRAS A SEAGULL OR CLAM HAS. THEY ARE LIVING THINGS JUST LIKE HUMANS.
WHEN I CAME BACK TO LA THE SKY CHANGED FROM A LOVELY BLUE TO A LOVELY BROWN
OHHHHH LOVE THIS OLD BLAST FROM THE PAST. 'WISHING WELL' BY TERENCE TRENT D'ARBY. YOU OLDER PEOPLE MAY NOT SAY IT BUT I BET A LOT OF YOU MISS PEOPLE LIKE BOY GEORGE AND HOWARD COSELL BECAUSE THEY WERE SO INTERESTING SO INTERESTING. ONE GOOD THING ABOUT '50' IS I'LL TAKE ALMOST ANY MOVIE MADE 50 YEARS AGO OVER ANYTHING MADE TODAY. I SAW THIS MOVIE THIS WEEKEND CALLED 'THAT'S ENTERTAINMENT' AND IT SHOWED ALL THESE MUSICALS FROM 1928 THRU 1958 AND THEY WERE JUST SO MUCH MORE ENTERTAINING THAN ANYTHING YOU SEE IN 2008.
I AM AUDITIONING FOR A SOUTHERN BELLE ROLE. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH TRYULYTRULYTRULYTRULYTRULYTRULY COULD CAAAAREE LESS WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF ME Y'ALLLLL.
YOU PEOPLE THINK IT'S TIME FOR ME TO MAKE SOME REAL MONEY AND HIT THOSE COMEDY CLUBS? MARCUS YOU NEED TO GENERATE SOME EXTRA INCOME BESIDES YOUR GREAT 'BESTSELLER' AND YOUR LOVELY TEACHING JOB. YOU NEED TO HIRE A FLESH AND BLOOD ACTRESS TO PLAY ME. I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW IF THAT ACTRESS/COMEDIENNE HAS ANY PEOPLE SKILLS WE WILL PACK EM IN AT THE COMEDY CLUBS BECAUSE I AM JUST WAY FLAT OUT FUNNIER THAN ANY OF THESE DULL COMEDIANS YOU SEE TODAY.
IT'S DECEMBER NOW PEOPLE. IT'S DECEMBER. REMEMBER WHAT FLIFI SAID. BUY A FEW NICE INEXPENSIVE GIFTS AND DON'T LET YOUR DEBT GET OUT OF CONTROL. IT'S RIDICULOUS TO SEE SOME PEOPLE SPENDING BLOWING THEIR BUDGET AND SPENDING FOUR OR FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS ON CHRISTMAS PRESENTS. I WILL SPEND ONLY A FEW HUNDRED MONTHS FOR PRESENTS. AS A STRUGGLING WAITRESS THAT'S ALL I CAN AFFORD ANYWAY.
GET RID OF THAT EXCESS WEIGHT. GET RID OF THAT DEBT. THAT'S MY MOTTO FOREVER. LIVE HEALTHY AND HAPPY FINANCIALLY. YOU PEOPLE UNDER 30 NO CREDIT CARD DEBT. YOU PEOPLE IN YOUR THIRTIES FORTIES AND FIFTIES (MARCUS?). SAVE SAVE SAVE. PAY THAT MORTGAGE OFF. GET RID OF THAT HOME EQUITY LOAN DEBT. INVEST IN A SAFE AND I MEAN SAFE RETIREMENT PLAN. ALL THIS 'NOT SAVING' AND LIVING LIKE BIG SHOTS IS WHAT HAS STARTED THIS 'HORRIBLE CREDIT CRUNCH DEPRESSION' IN THE FIRST PLACE. MORE THAN ENOUGH THOUGHTS FOR NOW. ENJOY YOUR BIRTHDAY WITH YOUR LADY FRIEND MARCUS.
